Fall and the Sukkot Moon
Took down two more trees yesterday, dead ones. Beginning to get into a rhythm. More today. Derek, next door neighbor, showed up. You said to come over when I heard the chain saw. I wouldn’t feel good lounging around with you out there working. Good man, Derek.
One of these trees was large and my cuts didn’t fell it. Makes me nervous since it’s cut, and could fall over on its own. Not how I want to die. Giving it wide berth I returned to the garage, got my two felling wedges and a hand-held sledge.
Pounded the yellow plastic one in the back cut. On the last hit with the sledge hammer the tree cracked, gave a mighty roar and crashed to the ground. Not quite where I’d hoped to put it, but close.
Weaker than I’d like. Carrying the saw, I feel it. Pounding the wedge wore me out. Take it slow. Gonna get a wagon to transport stuff. Fuel. Bar oil. Wedges. I can do this. Will take time.
Wu weiing through the days right now. Taking stuff as it comes, letting it be. I’ll leave forcing, slings and arrows, to the young ones. This guy’s gonna go with the flow. (this last sentence is aspirational, but my intent anyhow)
Flowing through the day today: workout, tree felling, cooking shrimp. Enough.
Without this attitude I search for what I haven’t done. That’s clear in many of these posts. I’ve not gotten back to the writing. I’ve not been to CBE. I’ve not read enough. These things reach around, make me feel as if I’m never finished. Always more to do. Always something I’ve neglected.
That fuels a sense of incompleteness, of not having accomplished everything. Instead of an emphasis on the actions of the day, the focus is on apparent inaction. Not necessary and damaging.