We all walk ancientrails. Welcome to the journey.


Written By: Charles - Apr• 05•20

Spring and the Corona Luna

Sunday gratefuls: PSA less than .02. Quest Diagnostics website. Seoah’s Korean pork barbecue Vietnamese style sandwich. Joe on Kakao, looking happy despite the impending shutdown in Singapore. First time changing Kate’s dressing on her feeding tube a success. Two nights with no leaking in a row! Two containers of dish washing soap pods from Amazon.

Got an email late yesterday afternoon from Quest Diagnostics. Your test result is in. Suck in stomach, breath out. Run upstairs to the loft, move the mouse ball to wake up the computer. Find the icon for Quest on the toolbar. Sign in. So many steps. Oh, there it is. <.02. Means a negative result for PSA. Which is as good a news as I could get with this one. Less than .02 means that the test, the most sensitive available, could find no psa.

What does it mean? A little hard to say, but it says at least this. Right now my prostate cancer has not overwhelmed the Lupron. A lack of prostate specific antigens (PSA) does not, however, mean no cancer. Not in this instance, because the Lupron itself suppresses PSA. In other words this test could have had bad news if it was higher than this, but didn’t.

One more Lupron shot on April 10th. Somewhere in early to mid-June, I’ll get a third super sensitive psa test. If that one is <.02, the likelihood will be that I’m cancer free. A cure for me remains possible. That’s really what this test means.

Relieved. Yet, because of the nature of Lupron and the only test available to measure my cancer’s presence, I hesitate. Not wanting to push too far into joy, not wanting to have buoyed hopes dashed in three months. Though, this is the best news I could have gotten. Need to let the joy out. Celebrate, celebrate, dance to the music.

Why be tentative? This is great news for today! And great news deserves a smile, many smiles, a pirouette, a leap, a big grin. I’m on the path to a cure still. Hallelujah. Smack my palm and do a jig.

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