Fall and the Harvest Moon

Tuesday gratefuls: That 8 point Buck in my back this morning. Cool morning. Legal wheels grinding, spilling ink and bytes as they go. A little blood, too. Joe. Working hard. Carol and Susan and Tara. Food bearers. Robin and Doncye. Rich. The realtor team. Jen, thawed. Me, too. Love.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: Love


Each morning I wake up and look out my window. Lodgepoles and one Aspen, tufted Grass, Wildflowers. I hold a wish each morning. To see a Deer or an Elk there, too. This morning. An 8 point Mule Deer Buck dining on the Grass. He fled when Kep when outside.

I have not yet gotten enough of the wild Creatures here. Will not. No one does. Each time they come as emissaries from that World before us. And the World without us. The one when the Beavers dammed the Creeks; the Mountain Lions lay on rocky overhangs for 8 point Mule Deer Bucks; the Bears found Bee Hives hung from Trees; the Fox snatched Voles from their dens. There were no cars. No chimneys. No stray Coke cans or plastic water bottles. No roads. No humans anywhere in these Rocky Mountains. Yes, even before the folks who were here before us engine users, we builders of power lines, and fellers of trees.

It’s beautiful here, Joe. Last night coming back from Brook’s tavern. Yeah, I miss the Mountains, too, Dad. But you’re going to another beautiful place. Beauty is an unsung virtue so often when it comes to choosing where to live. Essential to me. Like Air.


The house. Joe went there with a realtor/property manager. Military guy and his wife. May be tough getting much out of it. Some structural damage they think. I’m not sure how significant. Cleaning is a major project. But we knew that.

Made me clench a bit. I’m dumping cash into Jon’s death sequelae. I hope to get it back from the sale of the house. What if I can’t? Will have to spend some more before we even know the most probable answer to that question.

We have to have the house cleaned. Might be covered by home insurance. Fingers crossed. Also, Jon was required to maintain life insurance according to the divorce decree. But. Did he? And how will we discover where the policy is?

Then there’s the legal fees. Mounting as the true complexity of this situation becomes apparent. Still, necessary.

Not to mention death certificates and his cremation. Ready now.

Joe’s already been here almost two weeks and may stay now through next Wednesday. He wants to be sure the house work is on a path he can manage from Hawai’i. That would be three weeks away from his XO job with the General in charge of plans and strategy for the Indo-Pacific Air Force Command.

All this pales of course in relation to the currents of grief coursing through Ruth and Gabe. Joe takes Gabe to a Rockies game tomorrow night. I’ve reached out to both of them, no response from Ruth. Need to get a new rhythm established with them. Easier now that Jen and I are speaking. Still hard. They live a very long drive from here and Jen’s not likely to drive them up here like Jon did.


Meanwhile Marty, the stager, comes today. That Hawai’i project still on track, moving forward. Nothing happens without changes, obstacles, challenges. Expected. Even so, Jon’s death? Not expected.


This entry was posted in Colorado, Family, Feelings, Fourth Phase, Friends, Hawai'i, Hermitage, Judaism, Shadow Mountain, The Move. Bookmark the permalink.

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