Lughnasa and the Michaelmas Moon<\/p>\n
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Sunday gratefuls: Susan. The Woolly Retreat. Pruning. Yet more of Kate’s jewelry. Satisfaction at getting things done. Subway. Stinker’s gas. Lodgepoles. Black Mountain. That one forerunner Aspen. Golden. The Stars. The blackness of Space. Four amateur astronauts. New hearing aid. Roger.<\/p>\n
Sparks of Joy and Awe: The house on Shadow Mountain<\/p>\n
Tarot:\u00a0 Ten of Swords, Druid.\u00a0 King of Stones, Wildwood. (not sure about these two. for the first time. maybe it’ll hit me later.)<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n Met with Susan yesterday. She’ll house sit for Kep and Rigel when I drive to the Woolly retreat the first of November. We had a long chat. Dogs. Drivers in the mountains. Cars. She’s a Mountain type. Making a living anyway she can. She cleans houses and dog sits, lives in a rented room in King’s Valley. Almost 70.<\/p>\n Living in the Mountains has a strange and strong attraction for certain folks. Kate was one. She refused to consider moving. I’m one, too. Though. Once in a while, recently, I get twinges of, oh, this might be too much for me someday. Usually in the morning when I’m still sleepy, still not warmed up. But that worm is there.<\/p>\n Still remember the first days up here in the loft. I’d write, then look out the window at Black Mountain. Write. Look. A sense of being in the right Place. Yirah. Awe. When I’m down the hill, hot and bothered by all the traffic, I can turn the car West, head back up into the Front Range. I become peaceful again.<\/p>\n Kate’s here now. Forever. In the Iris bed. In Maxwell Creek. On the Yahrzeit wall at CBE. In my heart. In the bones and stones of this place. She died a Mountain Woman. Fits with the Earth Mother persona she nourished for over 20 years in Andover. A powerful attractant for me. Keep the memories, the torch for her going.<\/p>\n The running of the fence line is underway. Zeus. Boo. Kep. Thor. Rigel. Rigel. Boo. Thor. Kep. Yip, yip, yip, yip. Neighbors kept friendly by a fence. Yup, Robert Frost.<\/p>\n The day got away from me. I had to change the sheets on the bed, always a good workout. That damned Tempurpedic weighs 120 pounds and concentrates all of its weight right where you’re trying to lift it. Got it done so I laid down for a nap.<\/p>\n Of course. Cheer up, things could be worse. I cheered up and sure enough things got worse. Hope not though.<\/p>\n This is six months later. After a lotta upset. Kate’s death, grief, and the return of my prostate cancer. Jon’s various illnesses. Which continue. Sorting through the necessaries after Kate’s death occupied more time than I would have thought. Normal, though. Still not quite done.<\/p>\n As I’ve written, I can feel the tidal forces running with me now rather than pulling me out sea. Provided I can stay well, I think that will continue. Gonna get a flu shot and a vaccine booster in the next couple of weeks.<\/p>\n Tom had an interesting exercise for us this morning. He gave each of us a poem earlier in the week. We read them aloud and told the others what we thought.<\/p>\n Here’s mine:<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The Phoenix Again<\/strong><\/p>\n On the ashes of this nest After the flame, a pause, You cannot call it old It struggles now alone And one cold starry night To sing her thrilling song May Sarton<\/p>\n My reaction: I can feel, underneath the bone, my new wings pushing out. And I await the cold starry night when my new Phoenix self will take flight.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Lughnasa and the Michaelmas Moon Sunday gratefuls: Susan. The Woolly Retreat. Pruning. Yet more of Kate’s jewelry. Satisfaction at getting things done. Subway. Stinker’s gas. Lodgepoles. Black Mountain. That one forerunner Aspen. Golden. The Stars. The blackness of Space. Four amateur astronauts. New hearing aid. Roger. Sparks of Joy and Awe: The house on Shadow … Continue reading Underneath the bones, my wings are pushing out<\/span> ![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.ancientrails.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/20180409_173807-e1535114388933-420x403.jpg\")
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In my zoom meeting with my ancient buddies Paul, Tom, Mario, and Bill I checked in. Well. As near as I can tell, I have no tale of woe. For the first time in six months. They all laughed and clapped. Me, too. Yeah.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.ancientrails.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/astrology-natal-420x412.jpg\")
I also contacted Elisa Robyn’s, my astrologer friend from CBE. She’ll do a new reading for me on Monday, September 27th. I’m leaning in to the Tarot, astrology, Kabbalah world. Letting it speak to me. Call to me. Challenge me. Inspire me. That old skeptic me would pooh pooh all this. Showed him the door. What helps is what helps.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.ancientrails.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/Phoenix-420x368.jpg\")
<\/p>\n
\nLove wove with deathly fire
\nThe phoenix takes its rest
\nForgetting all desire.<\/p>\n
\nAfter the pain, rebirth.
\nObeying nature\u2019s laws
\nThe phoenix goes to earth.<\/p>\n
\nYou cannot call it young.
\nNo phoenix can be told,
\nThis is the end of the song.<\/p>\n
\nAgainst death and self-doubt,
\nBut underneath the bone
\nThe wings are pushing out.<\/p>\n
\nWhatever your belief
\nThe phoenix will take flight
\nOver the seas of grief<\/p>\n
\nTo stars and waves and sky
\nFor neither old nor young
\nThe phoenix does not die.<\/p>\n