So Long, Farewell

Fall                                                                                              Closing Moon

ruthandgabe 86The good-byes have begun. Went to the Walker this afternoon with Stefan and Lonnie. Having a place to move and a potential moving date, house packed on December 15th and 16th, gives definition to Colorado bound, a definition not possible even when the books were packed and the scout had been out doing her job.

(Ruth and Gabe on the first day of school this year.)

Pulling away from friends will be the hardest part. Lonnie and I have been going to the Walker together, off and on, for the better part of 30 years. The Woollies, the docents all many years of time. It was this glue that held me here a few years back when Kate and I first considered this move. The time was not right. Now it is.

As Lonnie said, you don’t leave friends behind, friends are for life. That’s true. The difference is the seeing and being seen on a regular basis. I’ll miss it, but the call of the mountains and the grandkids is stronger. Consequences, all decisions have them, neither good nor bad, just necessary.

Doing only the things that only I can do put Colorado on the will do side of our life’s work. Only I can be Grandpop to Gabe and Ruth. Only I can be father-in-law to Jen and stepfather to Jon. Only I can learn, for myself, what the West means within the unique context of my life. Only Kate and I can make this journey together, a bonded team.

And only I can say good-bye to you, my friends.

Back To Living In the Move

Fall                                                                                            New (Closing) Moon

Journey before destination. I’m back to this, back to living in the move. No longer as move-stupid as I was yesterday. With the critical Colorado mortgage process complete we can look at moving dates. I just e-mailed A-1 movers to see if the week of December 15th works for them. If it does, we would stay for the Woolly meeting, then follow the truck out to Conifer. If not, then we’ll go the first week of January.

There’s still residual weariness, exhaustion, not yet made up. I’ll be on the road again Wednesday, this time driving, so it will be a while before I’m fully caught up on my sleep. That drive will, however, be a peaceful one, listening to audio books, enjoying the quiet of a rolling retreat. Road trip!

It’s not like we’re finished. We have to finish packing, get that fence built in Colorado, pay many different people to do a lot of different things, but it’s manageable. Doable. The best part is that we can work toward the transition with our own decision making and judgment. The underwriter will have retreated to her underworld. If we’re lucky, no underwriter will make the trip up to judge us ever again.

So leave taking really begins. This move is happening and within a month and a half. Saying good-byes used to be a weakness of mine, sudden departures with no farewells. Not so today. I look forward to seeing many of you, Minnesota readers, before I leave. If somehow I miss seeing you, then good-bye.

 

 

Yes!

Fall                                                                                      New (Closing) Moon

9538 Black Mountain DriveYou may notice that I have changed the name of the moon. That means I will be driving out to Colorado next week for closing on our new home, 9358 Black Mountain Drive. Valerie, our mortgage consultant, called me about a half an hour ago and said the underwriter told her the loan would be approved! That’s one end of this process wrapped up. Now all we have to do is move, then sell this house.

Wow. Still trying to take it in. It was the result we hoped for, even expected, but until confirmed, anxiety. The rest of it feels down hill from here. The months of preparation mean we will easily meet a moving date in December or early January. Our stuff has been decluttered, our work on this house will move forward after we’ve emptied it and we can settle into our new place before the heavy Colorado snows of March and April.

Now the fence becomes the next highest priority, since without it, we can’t move the dogs. I’ll just keep calling until I find the right person.

I feel lighter, much lighter. We can focus on building that new life, a mountain life and a family life. Can’t think of a better way to spend the third-phase. Yippee.

BTW: Good job, Kate. Our scout.

Wait, Wait

Fall                                                                               New (Samain) Moon

Waiting is wearing. No news (which is good news so far) on the mortgage. We’ll know no later than Tuesday, October 28th, but that doesn’t leave much time between when I need to leave, driving, and the closing date of October 31st. If the decision is positive and we both imagine it will be, it will close off one end of the moving process.

Then, many other things become more straightforward. We can pick a moving date. We can make firm decisions about larger items that won’t work in the new place. We can do the math on almost all of the process and see what our assets will look like after closing. And project what effect selling this house will have on them, too.

I’m sleeping ok, but find that once I wake up, going back to sleep is not possible. Too many scenarios, ideas, issues hurdle the gate before the sheep can get there. That means I’m still in a modestly sleep deprived state, which I don’t like. It will pass.

 

A Magic Carpet Ride

Fall                                                                       Falling Leaves Moon

Another box. Carpet. 160 yards of a champagne colored floor covering that we may never walk on. Weird. At Hamernick’s Decorating in St. Paul we walked across the street from their main showrooms to another Hamernick’s building. This one, instead of aisles filled with flooring samples and fabric books, had stacked rolls of carpet. It would have made Harun al-Rashid comfortable.

Though there were more rows in the back, the front had two rows of carpet still attached to the cardboard rolls from the mills. Both rows were over my head in height which meant there were carpet rolls buried beneath as many four and five other rolls. Each row was probably 30 feet long. How did they get the bottom ones out, I wondered?

There was the answer. Near the open back door a man got onto an ordinary forklift with an unordinary front attachment, a long round metal probe, the exact length of the carpet rolls, drove it over and deftly picked up a fat roll. A worker there said he could get at any roll in “under 10 minutes.” Then, looking at the precarious portions of the two nearby rows stacked up against the far concrete wall, he amended that, “Well, maybe not those.”

Afterward Kate and I had lunch at Mai Village on University Avenue. While we waited for our food, I told Kate the story of the owners who flew Vietnamese carpenters in to build the interior. It’s a marvelous feat of woodcraft with delicate light sconces and elegant open screens, thick pillars, an interior roof over tables each with bamboo lengths carved from dark wood along the table edge. Each chair at the tables has an open back, again carved.

Later, on the way home, discussing what we would miss about the Twin Cities I used that story as an example. “I’ll miss,” I said, “the thick network of memories and concrete places, a network woven over 40 years. Like the story of Mai Village this network is idiosyncratic to these cities. But, part of the fun will be building a new network in Denver.”

Counting Down

Fall                                                                                    New (Samain) Moon

photoR

The Woolly meetings count down, now 2, November and December. Tonight a writing teacher came, courtesy of Charlie Haislet. We met in the casual room of the University Club, that quirky brick and ivy place where Summit curves north toward the cathedral and the state capitol.

We wrote, sharing pieces of our lives, not pieces held back necessarily, but pieces discovered in the writing and new then to the rest. It was a warm and loving meeting, for men of our age perhaps unusual, at least among the white educated demographic from which we all come.

I needed this immersion among my friends, my brothers because the week has been strenuous, even stressful. Yet, the time also points up the loss, heightens the foreground/background shifting of life now. Minnesota/Colorado. Colorado/Minnesota. In the mountains, on the Midwest.

When I drove down Highway 10 tonight, a point came where one sign indicated Minneapolis and the other St. Paul. Tonight I chose the left hand path since my destination was St. Paul. But, in a way that fork in the road sums up the last twenty years, living now north of two cities in which I have lived and places I love, going sometimes to this one and sometimes that.

The uncertainty of the mortgage underwriter decision process drains the joy out of this time for me and I look forward to knowing whether we will be able to proceed or not. If not, it’s back to the looking process. If so, it’s hop in the truck next week, canned goods and a computer onboard, an air mattress, a picnic set for dining at the new place, a bedroll. Signing documents here and there, talking to fencing contractors. Getting the new place turning toward our life.

Whole Forests Shudder

Fall                                                                                 Samain Moon

Mover. Selected. Home Insurance. Selected. Appraisal. Done. Sleep. Disrupted. 58 pages of documents collated and faxed in addition to the 30+ we sent out on Monday. Done. Whole forests must shudder each time a realtor makes a deal.

A list of 25 things that need to get done between now and move in. Examples: Inside work list. Paint bid. Carpet bid. Pick a moving date. Get specific house measurements. Buy washer/dryer. Contract for perimeter fence. Estate lawyers for Colorado estate law. Medical insurance in Colorado. Medical records to Colorado. Wireless setup. Utilities transferred. And on. and on. and. on.

Due to early rising to complete more document discovery, collation and transmittal both Kate and I are a little (ok, a lot) fried. Sleep deprived and wrestling with detail overload. I don’t feel overwhelmed, but I am pretty whelmed.

This two weeks will probably be the most intense of the entire process if our mortgage application is accepted. Here’s an example from the Hadean realm of the underwriter. When I sent them a copy of our IRA holdings and our Vanguard holdings, I did not print the second page. I never do to save paper. But, if it says page 1 of 2, the underwriter has to see the second page. Even though it contains nothing. So, reprint. Resend.

How this process ever got accomplished before fax and e-mail, I’ll never know. It must have required logistical expertise of military strength. In the early 1980’s I was involved in a major settlement with the Keith Heller folks. They brought you those lovely cement slabs with swatches of colored panels on the West Bank. When the community group with which I worked finalized the deal, we faxed my signature to Washington, D.C. to HUD. This was such a big deal-the faxing-that I have a picture of myself in the act.

Now there’s fax, e-mail, scanning. Document retrieval, sharing online. And electronic signatures. Without all this there is simply no way we could have contemplated finding a house and trying to buy it in a period of three weeks. Which also means, I suppose, that we would not have had this fun, super compressed period we’re in right now. Hmmm.

Rest

Fall                                                                                  Falling Leaves Moon

Getting back to a rested state after hyper nights. Wake up in the night and there, flashing before my mind’s eye, not sheep, but possible problems: the underwriter’s crazy pants behavior after almost wrecking our financial system, insurers who might not insure, too much money siphoned out of our cushion for a bear market, altitude sickness, escaping dogs. You get it.

If not problems, then possibilities: a sauna in the new space, perhaps built in above the garage where my workout area will be? A reading room with the fireplace, our two chairs, the small oriental and lamps. Our couch, TV, laundry, bedroom and bath all on one level.

Black Mountain roughly as it looks from the study
Black Mountain roughly as it looks from the study

Nights outside looking up at the non-light polluted sky. Working through Ovid and Caesar with a view of Black Mountain across the way.

Or how about all the new work building an extended family with Jon and Jen, Ruth and Gabe, Barb (Jen’s mother.)? Figuring out birthdays and holidays, opportunities to see them all at various times. The not always smooth nature of family life.

Then, too. Those side trips. Staunton State Park is 19 minutes from our front door. Maxwell falls 19 minutes in another direction. Gold mines to explore. Vintage railroads. New places to listen to jazz. New Mexico. Utah. Wyoming. All close.

See how a guy might lose sleep? Still, I need the rest. And I’m very glad to be returning to replenished.

Good Vibrations

Fall                                                                               Falling Leaves Moon

Whew. Third moving estimate. This one from A-1 moving, found on Angie’s List. Fred seems like a straight up, customer oriented guy. If his price is right, we’ll probably go with him. Refreshing, like our mortgage consultant Valerie Fischer he treated us as adults. Business is easier if everyone does that.

As you come into the Denver airport from the Frontier gates, there is a long exhibit on craft beers. How much Denverites drink. Most in the nation. How many kinds. How brewing works. Actual labels and bar pulls. Some history. It struck me as odd. Then I read an article about cities to which young college educated folks are moving. Denver’s in the top three. What’s one of the things this demographic gravitates toward? Craft beers. Ah.

Now the vibrations of Colorado have begun to invade Minnesota. We’re talking to Colorado bankers, realtors, insurance agents. Family. We’re moving, in our heads, our furniture into 9358 Black Mountain Drive. Considering how to fence the property. Where to keep the dogs at night. The slope has definitely tilted toward Colorado and Minnesota has begun to recede. Not in all ways, and not forever, but it’s receiving less attention now.

 

 

 

On where the midwest ends

Fall                                                                                        Falling Leaves Moon

 

There is no doubt that the 100th meridian has geographic, population and climate significance. But, for this Midwesterner, these real distinctions, though remarkable certainly, don’t truly spell the boundary for the Midwest. No, for me, the Midwest stops at the Front Range, that wall, that barrier of mountains that sit astride the 40th latitude. Here the rural heartland (and its own emigrants) and immigrants from various parts of Europe washed up against the intractability of the West

The 100th parallel runs through it: Cozad, Nebraska. The 100th meridian is significant in the U.S. for two quite distinct reasons. The first is that it marks the line beyond which land receives less than 20 inches of rain per year. On the other side of the 100th, in the rich agricultural heartland, lie the areas in the U.S. with abundant rainfall.

The second and related reason the 100th parallel is significant concerns U.S. population density. Many areas of the West fall into the lowest population density category: 2.5 people per square mile. As this website points out: “Low precipitation, poor soils, and rugged or mountainous terrain have discouraged more people from settling in these areas.”

Drive or fly across the 900 miles from Andover to Conifer, Colorado and these distinctions become self-evident. Over the weekend, as I flew back and forth the ground beneath me grew browner as we went west. Browner or shades of tan or gray. Also, the number of circles, like the foot-prints of circular footed aliens, increased. In one area I counted over 100 contiguous irrigation circles. They reflect the unyielding climatology revealed by the map above and the inevitable water apocalypse that awaits the last drop of the last aquifer that makes up the vast Ogallala.

Here is the population map. As you drive toward Colorado, the green farms of southern Minnesota, northern Iowa and eastern Nebraska give way to feedlots, cattle ranches and irrigated fields. So, in these two ways, the Midwest, it could be said, ends at the 100th parallel and the West begins.

At the Front Range the just awakening colonization of large arid West collided with its native inhabitants; then, propelled by rail and mining interests, crashed over the mountains themselves. Ranches large enough to sustain the cattle business, mines sunk deep into the living rock, railroads powerful enough to conquer the elevations and snow created the raw energy, but the lifeways of the Midwest, those who would grow things, start cities, industry, build schools, those lifeways came along past the 100th parallel.

Though the Midwest may begin to fade past Cozad, Nebraska as the high plains become drier, its cultural influence remains strong in Colorado, at least through Denver and its metropolitan area as well as the I-25 corridor of Colorado Springs, Longmont, Greeley, and Ft. Collins. So it could be claimed, and I would do it, that the culture of Colorado is neither Western nor Midwestern, but a hybrid. Yes, the Great Western Stockshow has rodeos and many horse related exhibits, but it also has milk cows and chickens, rabbits and pigs. Yes, Denver has a blue mustang with its front legs raised outside its airport, but it also has bicycle paths, digerati, industry and a Federal mint.

At least that’s how I see it right now, from the Midwest.