Spring Rushing Waters Moon
Asked Kate yesterday how she feels about my cancer reemergence. “It’s not real to me yet. I’m still dealing with my own stuff.” Yeah. She’s got a lung diagnosis yet to be made and an assessment of her viability for surgery. The current plan, to have a lung biopsy and the j-tube placement at the same time, has stalled. For reasons known to Colorado Pulmonary Intensivists, but not us.
The good news in her situation is that we know she can gain weight. The tpn has proved that. We know her anemia can be countered. The blood and iron infusions proved that. We need to get a plan for continued weight gain, the j-tube most likely, and a plan for the anemia, blood and iron infusions make sense to us. With those two major issues addressed, then the lung diagnosis, whatever it is, will need a plan, too. That can’t be made until we know the etiology of it. Can’t know that without a lung biopsy. So… The ball goes back to Colorado Pulmonary Intensivists.
The next couple of months will be intense. Although. As Tom said yesterday, he knew there was the inner Taoist in me that was calm. Yes. And the dominant part of me, I said. Doesn’t mean there aren’t ripples of anxiety, of stress, of fear. The interleaving of our medical issues has actually been good for me since I can focus, as I have been, on Kate’s more immediate needs while I wait for May 14th, the axumin scan, and May 17th when I meet with Dr. Gilroy at Anova Cancer Care. After the 17th the trajectory of my illness will be more clear, a prognosis probably in hand, and a plan for what to do.
I don’t think I’ve remarked on it here, but treatment after a radical prostatectomy, or for that matter after any cancer treatment that fails, has a weird name. It’s called salvage therapy. Sounds like the law of the sea rather than medicine. It also has an unfortunate connotation to me. Let’s see if we can do anything to fix this mess. Not confidence inspiring.
It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood. With 8-12 inches of snow forecast over the next couple of days. Colorado.