Satisfaction

Lughnasa Waning Harvest Moon

The next morning. Anxiety has subsided as the time approaches, probably no different from or in fact the same as stage fright.

There is some hoary bit about the anxiety being necessary for a good performance. Sounds like rationalization to me. The anxiety hits because we want others to think well of us, to like what we do and appreciate it. Sometimes they do not.

Since I long ago put on the mantle of one cuts across the grain of received wisdom and will voice unpleasant truths and questions, I know this too well. This does not mean I get no satisfaction from my work, not at all, just that sometimes the most satisfaction comes from the preparation, the crafting and presenting rather than the reception.

As for Roots and this morning, well, that now moves in the realm of action. Much better than imagining it.