Monthly Archives: April 2015

Feelings, Health

The Time of Not-Knowing

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Spring                                                                   Beltane Moon

Maybe it’s anxiety, but I don’t think so. My sleep habits have changed over the last couple of weeks. Where I used to get up once or twice, then return to sleep, now if I get up around 3:30 or 4:00, I’m awake! Oh, boy. Also, my naps in the afternoon have been briefer to non-existent.

If I were looking in on me from the outside, I’d say it’s anxiety. It makes sense given this time of not-knowing. Yet I don’t have that jittery, over caffeinated feeling. Distraction still marks some of my day, so maybe I’m not reading myself quite right. Repressing. Could be.

Anyhow I decided that sleep hygiene is not the most important facet of my life right now. It can wait until I’ve had my biopsy. If it stays like this, I’ll seek some help.

General

taxonomy

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Spring                                                               Beltane Moon

colorado floraThe taxonomy class last night was good. We covered a very brief history of plants, leaves, sex organs, flowers. We then went to the book Colorado Flora to learn how to use a key.

The teacher was a Netherland transplant. A lot of v’s where w’s would be in English.

I met a guy, a landscape architect, who works for the National Forest Service as a project manager. Colorado has the central NFS planning and design office.

Dogs

Where’s the E-Collar?

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Spring                                                               Beltane Moon

Shaggy dog story. We took Vega and Kepler to the vet on Monday. Kepler needed an e-collar to prevent him from worrying his tail. We brought the e-collar home, intending to put it on him in the evening.

When we went to get the collar, it was gone. We looked all over the house. No collar. OK, that’s weird. Where could it be?

As we eventually concluded, one of the dogs, probably Vega, picked it up, chewed on it and left outside in the backyard. Vega never liked the e-collar. When she had one, she refused to acknowledge on it, barreling through doors, bending the plastic so she could go where she wanted.

This was a pre-emptive strike against the cone of shame.

Friends, Garden, Health, Our Land and Home, Woolly Mammoths, Writing

A Significant Week

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Spring                                                                          Beltane Moon

This is shaping up to be the most significant week since our move-in week in December. We have a firm, funded offer on the house. Contingent on an inspection only and there won’t be much found. Closing date, May 29!

The urologist visit yesterday. Action, not anxiety. Always better.

The first of several plant identification classes tonight. This one is basic botany, mostly taxonomy, how to use identification manuals.

And, on Thursday, the Woolly retreat in Ely. In addition to the physical reconnection with friends–at an important juncture for me (prostate)–it will also give me a chance to reconnect with the Ely/Boundary Waters area. Superior Wolf will be richer for this trip and my motivation for working on it will go up, too.

Health, Minnesota

The Path

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Spring                                                                  Beltane Moon

Back from the urologist. The waiting room was like a gynecologist’s only reversed. Lots of old men, some sitting down in a tender way. None looking too happy.

Dr. Ted Eigner is a good find. He’s pleasant, clear, straightforward. After reviewing my psa, up to 6.2 since December’s 4.4, his physical finding which confirmed Dr. Gidday’s and my family history, he said, “It’s a no-brainer. We’ll do an ultrasound and get cells from 12 different sites.” That’s scheduled for May 14.

Today I got two things: a doctor in whom I have confidence and the next step on the path, a biopsy. After that? Won’t know until the biopsy results are in.

Kate asked me if I felt better. My first response was no. I had no new information. Then, a bit later. Well, yes, I feel better. I have a path and a good doctor.

This is not the only thing going on in my life. But it sure muscles out a lot of stuff. It does not push away the fact, the very good fact, that we’re expecting an offer on our house tomorrow evening. Selling Andover would move us squarely and completely to Colorado. We’re both more than ready for that.

General

The Week Ahead

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Spring                                                             Beltane Moon

Kepler
Kepler

Kepler and Vega to the vet at 8 am. Me to the urologist at 2 pm. Medical stuff today.

I have a program that asks me each day what my focus is for the day. Prostate. That’s my focus today. I don’t know how far we’ll get during this visit, hopefully some progress toward a diagnosis.

Got back to my workouts this morning. Latin and Superior Wolf will come along next. Feels good to have had a break, better to be back at it.

Advance notice that ancientrails will go dark from Thursday, April 30 through Sunday,

Vega
Vega

May 3rd. Camp du Nord, the site of this year’s Woolly Mammoth retreat, is a no wi-fi zone. I’m going to take the opportunity to unplug, hike, talk to friends, sleep.

Tomorrow night I have my first of several plant identification classes, four Friday sessions and four Saturday sessions this month with a couple of more classes in

GeekWorld, Our Land and Home, Shadow Mountain, The West

The Well-Watered House

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Spring                                                             Beltane Moon

Wildfire mitigation. That was on my mind when we went to the Conifer/Evergreen home and garden show. And, in a booth for a product that costs between $20,000 and $30,000 I got an idea that will help us a lot, an external fire sprinkler system.

The concept can be implemented far more simply than the battery maintained, 500 gallon reservoir system Waterguard offers. It’s automated and assumes loss of power to the house soon after the fire becomes a problem. Loss of power is a problem unless  you have a stand-alone, gas fueled generator. Which we do. It’s the first block in our system and needs to get installed soon.

After it’s in, we’ll review the various sprinkler systems available, I’m leaning toward one that is plumbed and covers the house, the garage and the defensible space. Defensible space is about 30 feet out from the house. This space needs special, intensive and unsentimental approaches to any fuel source: shrubs, grass, trees. The two together, a solid defensible space and an external sprinkler system, will bring over 90% of homes through a direct burn.

It will take a while to price and get bids for the system we choose, but we should be able to have it in place before the worst part of the wildfire season in late summer, early fall. I get sprinkler systems, having managed a twelve zone system in Andover for many years, and this makes sense to me.

Feelings, Health, Third Phase

Sun Breaking Through The Clouds

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Spring                         Beltane Moon

When I woke up this morning, I felt terrific. The haze, the gloom had lifted. Why? Have no idea except time and honesty. Honesty made sure the feelings were not trapped in a poisonous cluster reinforcing themselves; and, time has let the shock factor diminish.

Here’s a for instance. I looked up ghost towns in Colorado this morning. There are a lot of them and many not too far from here in South Park. The desire to get up, get out and go see things has begun to kick in, to put the Andover house and the prostate in the rearview for a day or so.

And I’m glad for it. I don’t like the down, distracted, glum feeling even though I know in this instance it’s referented and therapeutic.

So, I’m going to dig out the camera, the tripod, the binoculars and go on a road trip after the Woolly Retreat.

Family

First Grade Music Concert

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Spring                                                                       Beltane Moon

Thursday evening we attended grandson Gabe’s first grade musical concert, Patterns of Music. The energy in the room had kids, who can smell summer around the corner, literally bouncing off the walls. Several girls did handstands against mats hung from the gymnasium’s walls while others hung, sometimes two at a time from a pull-up bar. There were, too, snaking lines of children running, following each other on circuits through the crowd.

(Gabe’s self portrait. Reminds me of Egon Schiele.)

Gabe came out in his plaid shirt, looked up, saw us and waved. Many children sought out their members of the audience and did the same.

The singing was heartfelt and surprisingly in unison, amazing for approximately sixty kids. Afterward the pre-concert exuberance reasserted itself.  (Below, Gabe holds up the beetle.)

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Weather +Climate
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Spring                                                             Beltane Moon

Another large snow storm for us. Probably one last time. This forecast has snow only for elevations above 8,000 feet.  We had snow showers yesterday, brief but dense.