Fall Waxing Blood Moon
“There is only one success – to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it.” – Christopher Morley
It’s not the only success, but it’s sure right up there with love and family. Self-direction has always been at or near the top of my list and I’ve been lucky enough to find significant folks, Kate especially, who’ve honored the way I choose to live my life.
Long ago, before college, I decided I would never do anything that violated my own values. Never was a young man’s word, but the spirit of that vow has guided me well enough for over 45 years. Have I violated my own values? Of course, I have. Life happens. The essence of that commitment though is what Morley says, the ability to spend life in my own way. That means accepting the consequences, bad and good.
Sad news tonight. My aunt Barbara, my mother’s sister, had one child, Melissa. Barbara suffered from bipolar disorder and spent most of her life in state hospitals. She had a run of stable years during which she gave birth to Melissa. That was 40 years ago. Melissa died a a couple of days ago. She had re-entered family life only recently, we didn’t know where she was, so I did not know her well, but she was a first cousin and the first of us to die. There were 12 of us, now there are 11.
She leaves behind a son, John, and husband, Paul. Her mother’s life was difficult from the very beginning and my sense from the brief contact I had with her is that Melissa’s life was not easy either.
