There are times when the judgment of the universe becomes inscrutable. At best. The complex interplay among our nature, our nurture and the actual facts muddies the whys of life. Always. It is no wonder that humans seek answers, we are pattern seekers, probers, wonderers, wanderers. Yet, there may be no answers.
I know a family, a small nuclear family. A man, a woman, a daughter. Since January the full weight of heaven has fallen on their home. The man, in his fifties, a government employee, a sailor, an astronomer, a fixer. The woman, also in her fifties, a quirky domestic with an honesty and unflinchingness that marks her as unusual. The daughter, bright, also quirky, a maker of angel wings. A student of costume. A lover of the
Renaissance. Finished college early with a degree in history.
In January the man had a spell, a stroke they thought at first. Some improvement. Another spell. An MRI. Neurological. Holes appeared. Demylenation, a stripping away of the insulating layer of the nerve fibers. At first, a guarded diagnosis. After a second and third episode. MS Multiple Sclerosis.
Various treatments, but none working very well. Then, again some improvement physically. With the realization though that work had come to an end and life as he knew had vanished over night. The man has become sad, angry, depressed. He hits the dog with his cane. The dog will go to a new home this week. He wakes up at 4 in the morning and wants to argue. Considers suicide. Has gone from a detail guy, a traveler and friend to an invalid and a miserable invalid.