Spring and the Trial Moon

Wednesday gratefuls: Bosch. Pill Pockets. Shadow’s care. Snow. More today. Tara. Paul. Mario, the delivery guy. Maddie.

Rene Good. Alex Pretti. Say their names.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: Food

 

Kavannah: Contentment, Histakop. I have enough. Friends. Family. Money. Health. House. Help

Tarot: paused

One brief shining: Maddie drove up from her office in Arvada. She has other patients up here. She offered me oxy. Nope. Pain episodic and brief. Tramadol works well. She ordered trazadone for sleep. Gonna try it. Though. Tried Trazadone a while back and didn’t like it. Can’t recall why.

 

Feeling fuzzy. Not close to my best, yet far better than a week ago. Slept well again last night. The sleep mafia might have applied some vigorish to my sleep debt. Able to concentrate better. Only better. Not well. Frustrating.

Add that to overall weakness and bedtime has become my favorite. When I can lie down, neck and back supported. Yes.

Moving forward I’m hoping that Melissa’s cooking will begin to bulk me up. Had chili and corn bread last night. Very good.

I’m living to get to treatment. Back. Rest. It’s a poor excuse for a life. Given my current cancer reality however, this trial could be a window into a longer life. Worth pursuing.

The cost? Loss of muscle mass, sleep, occasional fogginess, constipation. Not trivial.

I’ve had several stressful medical encounters already this year. Right now I’m too tired to reflect on them. They can be cumulative and I feel that’s what I’m dealing with.

Till tomorrow.