Imbolc and the Snow Moon
Shabbat gratefuls: Snow. March. Shadow. Not quite potty trained. Great Sol. Toys for Shadow. Her food. Her wiggly happy greeting. Not allowing pain to rule. MVP. Seder. Venom’s Last Dance. Parsha Terumah. The Mishkan. Talmud Torah. Hanna Matsuri. Luau. My son. Seoah. Murdoch. Physical therapy. Amazon.
Sparks of Joy and Awe: Doggy playdates
Week Kavannah: Patience. Savlanut. When I rush, slow down. When I want to speak, wait. When my inner agonizer arises, calm him, move on.
One brief shining: After my nap, my body ached, I didn’t want to get up to move to do this anymore this weakness this doldrum of the daily life; then it was right then I began to throw my covers off saying to this too old too soon guy that no this weakness this sapping of the life force did not represent my nefesh it was my fear and my doubt so get back to your workouts your smiles your Shadow. And I did.
Another tough week at times. Mostly coincident with back pain. When tired and in pain, I find my inner strength weakens and the yetzer hara begins to take hold, dragging me back toward the slough of despond. Dredging up the what are you doings? The what sort of life is thises? The inner castigator. You should act politically. Write another novel. Stop watching so much TV. Be a man, not a patient. You know. That sorta thing.
Eventually my strong inner gyroscope rights from being pushed over by reactivity and shadowed understandings of reality. Puts these thoughts in context of my life, of my strong purposes now: Being a friend. Being a family guy. Loving Shadow. And myself. Learning and sharing about the New Apostolic Reformation. Writing Ancientrails. Learning Mussar. Studying Torah and other ancient texts. Sitting in the Mountain world, feeling its changes as Snow and Cold, Mule Deer and Elk gather round in their most ancient of all ways.
Life without a solution to pain challenges the soul. So does each day of our lives. It’s our task, and ours alone, to find the footholds on this technical climb and scale the rock face, as always with no rope.
Just a moment: How bout that live TV roast of former ally, Zelensky? The United States has become, in the scorching hot winds since January 20th, a thug nation. Extorting a nation when it’s down for its natural resources. Demanding them as vig for all the money spent on their defense.
If this government were an ordinary mobster on the streets of New York City or Philly, there would be a task force out to put them in jail. Instead they control the world’s most powerful military, led a hostile philistine take over of the Kennedy Center, and seem more focused on destroying governance than governing.
Note that here in the Rockies, not too from the Gulf of America, I’m writing this in the official language of our country, English, with no help from immigrant labor and a safe distance from those war-mongers in the Ukraine.