• Category Archives Travel

  • So. Awful.

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Thursday gratefuls: Salmon Sky. A late night. A virtual tour of Israel. All vegetarian potluck. BA and Expedia finally relent. Elite. That gut. Working to keep me safe. I think. Relaxed and comfortable cows in Israel. Israel. Hamas. Gaza. Palestinians. Blood lust. Peace. War. Yellow Willow Trees. My favorite Lodgepoles swaying gently in the Wind. A good workout yesterday. Starlink at 106 mbps this morning.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: CBE

    One brief shining: Looked out my downstairs window just after I got up to see a true salmon color behind the Lodgepoles to the northwest and red Sky in the morning sailor take warning shuttled through my consciousness making me remember the heavy breathing from the meteorologists as a weekend Storm approaches with the promise of Snow, big Snow.

     

    Had a catch in my breath when my phone notified me of changes to my flight for yesterday. What? Hopped on Expedia and chatted with an agent who tracked down that yes I had canceled the flight. He wrote these well received words: your refund will come in 7-10 days. That flight to London and then Tel Aviv had more lives than a whack a mole. Went through several different iterations of what might happen with it. Frustrating. Resolved now.

     

    The war. Read an op ed piece in Haaretz that made my hair stand up: It Is Forbidden to Even Empathize With Innocent Gazans.  Author Gordon Levy strips bare the blood lust running Israel right now. This is fear and loathing of a sort that serves only the Hammas sympathizers. The opposite of what Israel needs right now. This god awful mess of a region needs a second coming just to sort through all the b.s.

    It sure seems like the world has become at least pro-Palestinian if not anti-Israel. I’m pro-Palestinian, anti-Hamas, and pro-Israel. This is not an easy stance to take right now, but it matches the situation as I understand it. I agree with Biden that the end point of this war only makes sense if a two-state solution is not only on the table, but realized. I also agree with Israel that they have the right, even the responsibility as a nation to take Hamas off the board.

    Not sure how you could come to the conclusion that Hamas were freedom fighters. They murdered civilians, took civilian hostages, and use their own people as human shields. No. Hamas is a terrorist organization with the aim of ridding the Middle East of Jews. Does Israel have moral failings that show up in the condition of Gaza, the settlers in the West Bank, the apparent wipe’m out sentiment now holding sway there? Yes. Does not mean that Israel should let Hamas or Hezbollah or Iran run free in their country. No. They have to be held accountable as must Hamas, but their right to defend themselves is clear.

     

    We held a meal last night for those of us who would have gone to Israel but couldn’t. We each gave short presentations on sites we chose some time ago. Originally meant to supplement the guides on the tour bus.

     


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  • Not happening has become something that happened

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Wednesday gratefuls: Darkness. Quiet. Rain. Snow coming. Cool nights. Rich Levine. Ron. Alan. Joan. Tom and Diane. Israel. Gaza. Palestinians. Settlers. War. Peace. Turkey. Erdogan. Anti-semitism. Pro-Palestinians. I’m pro-Palestinian, but anti-Hamas. Political failure has drastic consequences. Netanyahu. Israel’s protest movement. Aid to Gaza. Feeling the walls of world opinion closing in. An olive tray. Biet She’an. The Decapolis. Dinner tonight of those of us who didn’t go to Israel. An oddly bonding experience.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: Internet

    One brief shining: That glass tray with curved dividers will have olives in it tonight at Mark Lehrner’s place: kalamata, castelvetrano, nicoise, olives stuffed with garlic, olives stuffed with blue cheese and represents my passing on making Middle Eastern food, yet also wanting to contribute to this consolation prize dinner where my fellow non-travelers will share research we have done on sites of interest in Israel.

     

    Here’s how it goes for me. 19 days after Hamas viciously murdered women, men, and the elderly, children, beheading babies. I would have left for Jerusalem today. Would have had 5 days to roam around this ancient city, holy to so many. Eating Israeli breakfasts, crashing when I got tired. Learning from the wonderful museums and the living history of the Arab quarter, the souk, the old city, the Western Wall. Al Aqsa. By talking to folks of diverse backgrounds and points of view. Then on Samain, the Celtic New Year, I would have spoken with three Reconstructionist rabbi’s, had my penis pricked for one drop of blood, gotten naked and immersed in a mikveh, and spent the rest of the tour in my first days as a converted Jew. No. Not gonna happen.

    Insignificant in the larger picture? Of course. Very significant among my fellow travelers and especially so for Veronica and me who planned to become Jews in Jerusalem. Hard to find the right words, but I feel like something important, something life altering has happened. Because all these things did not happen though I had intended them to. Paradox.

    My conversion will always be the one that didn’t happen in Jerusalem. Because the whole world of Judaism got sucked into this desperate and ill-understood conflict. Again. Still. And I got sucked into it, too. Willingly. That was the point after all, to say yes, these are my people. I cast my lot with them for now and always.

    The not happening has become something that happened. That changed me by immersing me not in the mikveh but in a dark and troubled sea. Which perhaps because of my nature has only made me feel more certain of my choice, more bonded to CBE and worldwide Jewry. These, my people, are in trouble. This is when we stand up and declare who we are.

    I am a Jew. Not ritually, not yet, but I am already a Jew. One caught in the vice of ancient blood feuds and unable to see a clear path out of them. Yet I see this clearly: we will figure the way out together.


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  • Starlink, Internet Bright

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Tuesday gratefuls: My back. Its complaints. Mary’s solutions for managing them. First thing in the morning after the Shema. The beauty of fall transitioning to winter. The skeletal Aspens. The yellow leaved Willows and the red barked Dogwood. The Asters blooming in my back yard. Kurt Bohne. Starlink. Shadow Mountain Home2. Download: 105. Upload: 20. Elon Musk. Shadow Mountain. The drive into Evergreen. The Mountains and Valleys along the way. CBE. Israel at an inflection point.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: really fast internet

    One brief shining: Kurt and Shawn put a ladder against the gutter, carried a Little Giant ladder up the roof and got to work first installing the mount, then the Starlink rectangular antenna on the mount, running Starlink’s cable down the side of the house and into the router and connecting the ethernet ports, while with my phone I created a new router address, plugged in a password, and after that things were just fast, fast, fast.

     

    I know. I know. Supporting Elon Musk. Yes, he’s a reprehensible person politically, but boy does he engineer good products. The Tesla. The Boring Company. SpaceX. And, my only personal connection to his empire since I don’t use the X formerly known as Twitter, Starlink. For years I’ve had ok service from Century Link, using two DSL lines to get around 40 mbps. The price difference between the two services is $14 a month. Worth it for 80-100 mbps. Also, when the phone system goes down in a storm my internet will not. Happy to be with them. Kurt and Shawn who installed it for me were great guys. Would use them again if another need arises.

     

    Laid in logs and firestarting materials after adding the rest of my firewood to the stack next to the fireplace. If we get snow over the weekend, I’ll be in my chair reading about Jewish life cycle events or the new Jessamyn Ward book, watching the fire. Gotten used to burning pine. Would really like to get some oak or maple though. It’s available down the hill where they have a variety of deciduous trees, but I’ve never sought it out. Maybe this year.

     

    Israel. Hoping Thomas Friedman’s words, Biden’s, Blinken’s, Austin’s convince the Israelis to slow roll, if not eliminate a ground invasion of Gaza. And that Israel can show its humane side to the world, not just its bristly, never again ferocity.

    The court of public opinion has turned against Israel. My sister Mary says there are pro-Palestinian rallies in Muslim Malaysia where she now lives. There is, too, sentiment that the U.S. has it right in the Ukraine, opposing Russia, and wrong in Israel, supporting the oppressor. The situation in Israel is so much more complicated than that. Neither side covers themself in glory. A solution has long been stiff armed by both Arabs and Israelis.

    I would have left tomorrow for Israel.

     

    Seoah and Murdoch celebrated my boy’s 42nd birthday last night. Party hats, cake. Murdoch sat on the bench at the table. Very cute.

     


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  • Others

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Saturday gratefuls: Lutheran Spine Center. Mary. Melody. Tara. RSV vaccine. Safeway. Israel. BA cancellation. Keshet. Conversion. Mikveh. Embracing the darkness as we move toward the Winter Solstice. Samain. The fallow time. Business mornings. Tuesdays. P.T. exercises. Workouts. Keeping up with it. My novels. The new one aborning. Kep, my sweet boy. Kate, always Kate. Seven Stones. Gabe. Ruth. Friendsgiving. Thanksgiving. Relationships. Family. My boy, Seoah, Murdoch. Friends. Deciding what comes next.

    Sparks  of Joy and Awe: Joann

    One brief shining: Once again confirming my medications, giving my date of birth, looking at my oxygenation, my blood pressure all fine as I prepare to meet yet another doctor, this time Melody, a p.a. physiatrist, who has me bend side to side and forward, who takes both of my legs and twists them this way and that, any pain, stops and says you have every reason to be hopeful as she left the room when we were done.

     

    Yes, my Korea experience still has me on the road for visits to physical therapy and then Lutheran Spine Center yesterday. Melody confirmed my conjecture that my recent neglect of resistance work probably led to my flare. Why did I do that? Not depressed. My best guess is. Got tired of it. Self care takes time. The older I get the more time it takes. Wanted to save a little time by not doing the resistance. Bad choice. Melody also made me feel good because she expressed surprise that I’d held off this back trouble for so long. Definitely your working out. And, she said, if you keep up your exercises you have every reason…

    I know these things to be true. I know. But. There’s a certain weariness that comes with repeating the same things over and over. Get on the treadmill. Do the squats. The chest presses. The lawnmowers. The dips. The bicep curls and the shoulder presses. The skullcrushers. Those core exercises. Now adding in physical therapy exercises for my back specifically. Guess I need an attitude adjustment. Working out keeps me able to do the things I want to do. Like travel. Go see friends and family. Take care of myself while living alone. Pretty important stuff.

    New attitude. Take the time. It’s worth it.

    Similar note. Got my RSV vaccine yesterday at Safeway. Still seems weird to me to go the grocery store for anything medical. Yet there you are. Some kerfuffle with my birthdate and my medicare card made me wait longer. Then a quick jab, a bandaid, thank you. Noticed while I was there that Safeway has renamed their aisles using local street names: Barkley Road and Shadow Mountain Drive, for instance.

     

    At breakfast with Tara yesterday I had an aha. At this point in my life relationships are what matter. Not even writing that new novel or finishing Jennie’s Dead. Not even traveling unless it includes building or deepening relationships. Hmm. That one may not be right. I still like to travel alone. Not even striking another blow for justice. I spend more time now having breakfast and lunch with friends, seeing Gabe and Ruth, my son and Seoah, than I do on anything other than taking care of myself. And it never gets old or repetitious. No, I’m not converting to extroversion. I still don’t like crowds or parties or too many people around. But one on one or with two or three others? Yes. That’s where the juice is in my life now.

     

     


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  • Conversion on again

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Friday gratefuls: BA canceled my flight. So, I can get a refund. Parking refunded. Tour group money held over for a trip next year. All resolved for now. With some money coming. Conversion. At Temple Emmanuel mikveh. Last week of November. Mussar. Evergreen Market. Sugar Jones. Rabbi Jamie. Zionism. Very good workout. 2 sets of resistance. Luke. Anne. Darkness my old friend. Sounds of Silence. The 60’s. Jackie. Her and Ronda’s sweetness. Her sauna. Growing my beard out.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: Ritual purity

    One brief shining: Ruth called yesterday wanting to know if she and her friends could have a Friendsgiving at my house, of course I said, and checked in with her about an evening out at Dazzle, the jazz club, next Saturday works for her so so good to talk with her, hear Mia on the phone saying hi Grandpa, and her other friends saying hi. Made this old man happy.

     

    I’ve taken Mia in as a granddaughter from another family. She was so helpful and kind when I had to euthanize Kep, helping the vet carry him up the stairs, staying with Ruth while Kep died. Mia grew up on Oahu, moving here when her father’s biochemical company needed better access to the U.S. as a whole. She even said she missed me. Aw.

     

    Yesterday was busy. Diane in the morning. Then an intense and good workout. Going up on weights on some exercises. Back exercises added in. After that a shower and over to Jackie’s Aspen Roots hair salon. Was gonna be a sprucing up before my trip. Both Jackie and Ronda were glad I’m not going to Israel. I’ve never had so many people happy about a trip I’m not taking. As I left Jackie turned to Ronda and said, we’re going to have to start looking for someone for Charlie. Uh-oh.

     

    From Jackie’s straight to CBE for Thursday mussar and my second conversion education session with Rabbi Jamie. In both the mussar setting and my session with him after the focus was Israel/Hamas. The topic for our session had been Zionism which can be seen as the proximate cause of the struggle Israel and its Arab neighbors have faced since its founding.  That is, it was the Zionist movement of the late 19th century which set off the chain of events creating a Jewish state in 1948. Immediately after Israeli nationhood Egypt, Syria, and Jordan attacked it with the stated goal of pushing the Jews into the ocean. The Arabs lost the war. But the conflicts signaled in that first military action may have changed actors from time to time, but not the goal of eliminating a Jewish presence in the Middle East.

     

    When we moved onto my conversion, I said I wanted to get it done as soon as practicable. A little cold for going to a flowing stream or lake for a naked plunge. Though I would have been up for that. We settled on a newer mikveh, a ritual bath that has to be connected to flowing water, built by Temple Emmanuel, a large Reform congregation in south Denver.

    Discovered that Joann Greenberg had asked to be a community representative in my beit din, house of judgement, or rabbinic court. That surprised and pleased me. I have about a half hour interview with her, Rabbi Jamie, and a third Rabbi yet to be named who will also be the one who draws a spot of blood from my penis. Then, naked immersion in the mikveh. And I’m part of the Jewish community for ever and a day.

    Rabbi Jamie also asked me which parsha I wanted for my conversion week. A parsha is the long weekly section of Torah that allows the entire five books of Moses to be read through in a year. At first I thought, wha? Then I got it. I want the parsha with Jacob at the Jabbok Ford wrestling an angel. That story I consider paradigmatic of my own spiritual journey. If you know the story, Jacob’s name changes that night to Israel, one who struggles with God. That story shows up this year in late November which is why the conversion will be then.

     


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  • Life remains

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Tuesday gratefuls: Israel. Hamas. Hezbollah. U.S.A. Germany. Ukraine. Great Britain. Jordan. Lebanon. Saudi Arabia. Iran. Iraq. Kuwait. The Emirates. War. Peace. Restraint. The world in trouble. Tom. Diane. Mark. Mary. Great Sol spotlighting the Lodgepoles at the peak of Black Mountain. Mice. Fox. Mule Deer. Elk. Bears of all sorts. Mountain Lions. Maxwell Creek. Bear Creek. Cub Creek. North Turkey Creek. Starlink. Creative Audio. British Airways. Traveling. My back. Mary, my physical therapist.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: The Rules of War

    One brief shining: Black Mountain sets its curved body against the Colorado blue Sky, accepting Great Sol as the light and warmth pour onto its Lodgepoles, it provides a way for Moose and Elk to cross from Staunton State Park to Shadow Mountain and back again without human interference.

     

    And here’s another, perhaps more important truth. Life goes on while Israel masses tanks and soldiers and other instruments of war at the Gaza Strip. The Mountain Lion waits on an ailing Elk to pass under its ledge. The Marmoset skitters quickly back into its rocky den. A Raven lands in my front yard. The schoolbus picks up students. I get in my car and go to Evergreen, another appointment with Mary.

    I learned this after Kate died. My world shaken to its core traffic went by on Black Mountain Drive. The Mule Deer wandered into the yard eating bunch grass. CBE had its services. Netflix streamed movies and TV dramas. Even the same ones Kate had watched as her time came to an end. We wink out and are gone. The same with nations. Where now is Rome? Carthage? Akkadia? Persia? The Greece of Alexander the Great? Even Yugoslavia. Czechoslovakia. The USSR. Gone.

    There is a difference here though. Israel and its existence represents so much to Jews around the world. Hamas attacking it is an iteration of other attacks throughout the centuries. Attacks Jews have weathered, come out of stronger and more determined. If Israel were challenged with defeat, it would not slide easily into the dustbin of time.

    Ran into Ellen Arnold after my physical therapy. We talked for a bit. Shaking our heads. No easy or obvious solutions. So little understanding of the complex history of Israel and Palestine since 1948. Nobody comes out of it with laurels. All are implicated. Jews and Arabs alike.

     

    Back to my old pattern with cardio and resistance, balance work. Felt good to get past one set of resistance. Up to two. Three next week. What I need. Going to consider setting specific goals for cardio, resistance, balance. Interesting advice from a primer on how to extend healthspan suggested this improves performance and healthspan.

     

    Not traveling now. In spite of British Airways refusing to refund my ticket. I could still go since so far they are flying into Tel Aviv. No group tour now so makes no sense. Doesn’t matter to BA. May have to reschedule for May if they don’t stop flying to Tel Aviv by a week from tomorrow.

     


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  • No. Easy. Answers.

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Sunday gratefuls: My boy. A sweet man. Seoah in her cream outfit. Murdoch looking happy and fit. Zoom for the far away, a real gift of technology. Israel. Hamas. Hezbollah. Lebanon. Egypt. Iran. Saudi Arabia. Shiites and Sunnis. Jews and Christians. War. Jus in bello. Divided nations. A world on the brink of too much. Fighting. Warming. Fear mongering. Hatred. Let’s turn it around, make it a world overflowing with too much love. Blinken. Biden. Thousand and One Nights. Bereshit. A dawn coming.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: Love

    One brief shining: Those photographs burned out cars, children being carried into a Gaza hospital, the bloodied sheets in a kibbutz home, tanks cranking forward, bodies of Israeli’s and terrorists held in bags, missiles painting the air with white trails, and I sit here on Shadow Mountain watching the sun outline Black Mountain for another morning, a new day, a new life, another chance to live and love.

     

    Sadness. Grief. For all of us. For Israelis and Palestinians. For the oh too delicate fabric of order, a thin veil now in the Middle East. What happens if Ukraine and the Middle East stay in conflict for weeks, months, years? How thin will that same veil become not only in the Middle East but in Europe, in the Far East? How long will it take for the veil to turn into a shroud? These are dangerous, dangerous times not only for those poor folks in Israel and Gaza and Kyiv, but for all of us.

    What are the steps toward a world at war? Are we seeing them right now? With Russia and China standing with the Arab countries, against the Ukrainians? The world order, new or old, always bears the potential for large scale conflict.

    Talked with my boy last night. Thank god he’s in a nation at war, but one with an armistice in place and a relatively calm current situation. Strange to think of Korea and the Far East as a safer place right now, but it is. Could change of course. And, in a moment, like Israel, but that seems unlikely.

     

    As to my conversion. Which will not happen in Jerusalem this Samain. Made more real, more certain, more actual in spite of no ritual by the sudden immersion in what it means to be a Jew in the Middle East. And in the U.S., Europe. In an existential way new to me I feel the buzzing, blooming confusion of anti-semitism engaged by other Semites. Of the desire for a safe haven after the horrors of the holocaust so often challenged by vandalism, by speech, by acts of violence, by murder, by terrorists. This is not the first war Israel has fought. Nor, I’m sure, will it be the last.

    What is new to me is not the moral bifurcation of Israel as victim and Israel as occupier, oppressor. No, that bifurcation a source of tension and uncertainty has existed since 1948 and the formation of the nation. What is new to me is the recognition that anti-semitism will not just die away with that political solution or that military intervention or that expression of good will. Which makes me see Israel’s defense of itself in a different light, a burden of strength in a world that still wants to kill Jews, does kill Jews for being Jews. How can it be both a bulwark against anti-semitism and a peaceful neighbor to folks who want to see it erased from the world map? No. Easy. Answers.


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  • Cancel Culture

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Samain Moon

    Saturday gratefuls: My colon. Meds. My son, Seoah, Murdoch. Songtan. Evergreen. Conifer. Pine. Bailey. Us Mountain folk. Those down the Hill. Stars in the night Sky. Great Sol. Israel. Hamas. The rules of war. War. The USAF. Diane. Tom. The Ancient Brothers. This computer, now so old yet still at work. Palestinians. Israelis. Lebanese. Iranians. All human. Difference. So potent. The Fox yesterday at Upper Maxwell Falls. Aspen’s lighting the way toward heaven. Toward the light in the inner sky. Fall in the Rockies.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: 21 degrees right now

    One brief shining: My neighbors and I have only one evacuation route, left or right, toward Conifer or Evergreen, and if wildfire comes we’ll pile up on it in haste like the Gazans now trying to leave the north of an already small territory, the wildfire has come for them in the form of the IDF, a human wildfire stoked by rage and vengeance, what we here in the Lodgepole forest would call a crown fire.

     

    First thing now I look at Haaretz, then Yediot, then the Jerusalem Times. Later I scan the NYT and the WP. Not sure what I’m looking for, trying to find a way through this thicket of information. One that doesn’t end in news I don’t want to see or hear. No luck with that so far.

    I feel like I can have a good grasp of what’s going on at least at a macro level, but at the point of individuals and families, suffering. No. I think of my son and his family first value. Must be the same with Israelis and Palestinians. Right? What does, can that mean in the current context?

    Speaking of context. I found this opinion piece by Haaretz columnist, Anshel Pfeffer, very astute on the larger and historical context anti-semitism places on the Israeli/Hamas struggle: The Inconvenient Context: Palestinians Massacred Jews for Being Jews

    As of this writing, I’m 98% sure I’m not going. Diane rolls her eyes here. Why not 100%? Well. You know. Until we all discuss it together I won’t decide for sure.

    Several couples have already canceled their flights and Keshet, our tour operator, will send out a letter on Monday or Tuesday outlining our options with them. I hope postponing is the favorite option. I’m willing to let them hold onto my money if that will help them survive this crisis. Not keep it. But hold onto it until another tour can get scheduled.

     

    Meanwhile American Republicans rise to this escalating military and humanitarian crisis by failing to choose a speaker for the House. By supporting their felonious candidate who dodges debates and acts like a spoiled child angry at his parents. By trying to force the government into a shutdown. Again.

    We, the world hegemon, cannot act within our own system of governance. How can we expect to be guarantors for any one else?

    Read an interesting analysis that suggested the Ukrainian and Hamas/Israeli situations might be linked to our waning power as hegemon. Regional actors may feel emboldened to just go for it in situations where the threat of U.S. intervention would have given them pause in the past.

    This is called multi-polarity, a world in which no one power dominates. Hope this is wrong.

     


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  • Israel. A bit more

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Harvest Moon

    Thursday gratefuls: Israel. Blinken. Biden. Hamas. Hezbollah. Iran. Mark in Saudi. Diane. Tom. Rain, cold Rain. News. Korea. North Korea. South Korea. Seoah and her family. My boy. Mary in K.L. Songtan. Osan. Shadow Mountain. Starlink. Creative Audio. Newspapers. Justice. A many splintered thing. Spinal stenosis. P.T. Mary. Murdoch. Kepler and Rigel. Gertie and Vega. Kate, always Kate. Jon. Ruth. Gabe.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: P.T.

    One brief shining: When an American Secretary of State says I come here as Jew and as a Jew who lost family in the Holocaust, when he says Israel will never stand alone, when the President of the United States declares the acts of Hamas evil and sends an aircraft carrier support group, when Jews lie dead in their home victims of ideologically sanctioned murder, then we know the enemy, the ones who hate Jews, hate Israel, and will not allow their own humanity to impede their actions.

     

    Got a note from Expedia today. Your travel to Israel may be affected. Go to your airlines website. I did. Yep. Can cancel with no charge for travel between Oct. 7th and December 4th. Also. No flights until December 5th at the earliest. Well, that about does it for the trip. I’ll wait until Sunday to cancel my flight, see what others plan to do, but if we can’t fly there we can’t go. What that means for the Keshet trip? Uncertain. Probably postpone. Maybe cancel instead and rebook.

    Having the trip planned. Hamas’ invasion. Reading Jewish newspapers. Learning about Golda Meir and other Israeli leaders during times of military peril. Studying Israel and Zionism for my next session with Rabbi Jamie on the 19th. Dancing with the Torah on Friday night as Hamas readied its fighters. Meeting yesterday morning with Geoff and others who also planned on this trip. An immersion in Jewish life. In the dark and lonely side of what it means to be a Jew. A heightened and deepened inner knowledge of the dream of Israel and its physicality, its critical importance for Jewish life in the diaspora.

    Oh.

    Like many, perhaps most of Beth Evergreen fearing too for the Palestinians in Gaza. For the also dream of a Palestinian state. For a permanent and viable solution to this awful, unjust life for them, for Israel, for Jews everywhere. For justice.

    No to murder of civilians and the taking of civilian hostages. No to anti-semitism. No to terror. No to Hamas and Hezbollah and Iran in their hatred of Jews. No. No. No.

    How to hold both of these feelings at such a time? How? Both necessary, both just, both compassionate. The world has its contradictions, its pain, its seemingly unresolvable conflicts. Look for a moment at our own country. Red and blue. MAGA and the rest of us. Ireland. China and the Uighurs. Afghanistan. Armenia. India. Sri Lanka. I suppose in each of these situations there are those torn by loyalties that seem irreconcilable.

    Some must live with their hearts opened, their eyes clear, their minds knowing. Mustn’t they?

     


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  • Decisions

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall and the Harvest Moon

    Wednesday gratefuls: Rain changing to Snow. Cool nights. Israel. Hamas. Hezbollah. Iran. The Middle East. Shirley Septic. Home. CBE. Reasons to go to Israel. Reasons to not go. Mike. Sandy. Jamie. Bill. Steve. The Kaufmans. Islam. Judaism. Christianity. Taoism. Buddhism. Hinduism. Zoroastrianism. Santeria. Voodoo. Animism. Paganism. The search for meaning, purpose. Rabbi Jamie, a wise man. Geoff of Keshet. Shiva. Showing up for those who mourn. The Bernsteins. Rebecca. Leslie. Kate, always Kate of blessed memory.

    Sparks of Joy and Awe: Lev, the heart/mind

    One brief shining: A cardboard box of coffee, a tray with lox, capers, onions, tomatoes, bagels and schmear, blueberry muffins on the table, a zoom linked television screen above it, possible travelers to Israel around it, talking of fear of wanting joy of grandchildren who didn’t want them to go of money of changed purpose of options.

     

    Geoff the Keshet rep who lives in Israel attended our 8 am meeting. Originally scheduled for last minute details, passing out luggage tags, gathering the excitement into a group moment. All changed by Hamas and its invasion of Israel during Simchat Torah. Geoff had a serious face, not the usual smiling travel host persona. He told of his three children in the reserves now called up. Two in safer places, one stationed near the Gaza strip. His voice broke. Stopped. He talked of his sixteen year old and his eleven year old at home. Torn between business and difficult family and political reality.

    I felt sad for him. The conversation passed that feeling by though in favor of: My wife and I have talked. This is not the trip we want. We wanted to celebrate Israel, find joy. Also, Delta airlines has stopped flying to Ben Gurion. And. I have personal reasons, health challenges. My kids and my grandkids don’t want me to go and I can’t leave them with that worry. And. This doesn’t feel like the right time to be a tourist. Even my friends in Israel are saying don’t come. And. Our tradition is clear. We show up for those who mourn. Shiva. Showing up whether you know the mourner or not.

    Some shift. Well, if we could help. If the trip could have a different purpose. And. I will not let fear make my decision. Terrorism is about instilling fear and I won’t let the terrorists have that win. (echoes of G.W.)

    At some point during this subdued but intense conversation I asked to speak. Geoff, I know the business side of this is important, but I wanted you to know that I felt sad when you began the meeting. Wanted you to know that. Others followed. The conversation shifted again. Reasons to go, reasons still not to go.

    I’m for showing up, I said. A few nodded. Others remained ready to cancel or postpone. Let’s set a date for making a decision. We did. This coming Sunday at 3 pm before an all congregational gathering to discuss the Israel/Hamas war.

    Afterward I went to Mike who had mentioned prostate cancer as his health challenge. I have it, too. We talked a bit. Discovered that we’re both recently off all the drugs, now in the waiting period to see what affect all the treatments have had. Both of us to have blood work after the Israel trip. Life, and cancer, goes on.

     


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