Beltane Closing Moon
Printed out Superior Wolf’s first few chapters to read today. I need to reenter that world, get back to writing. Will try some Latin as well.
Prime task today. Sign and mail closing documents. This requires visiting a notary.
Second workout. Back at it.
Sleep still problematic. Not anxiety. I don’t feel anxious. I am weary, right now, of possible threats to my life, threats issued by own body. Still in the in-between, some information but not enough stage.
Spring Beltane Moon
This is shaping up to be the most significant week since our move-in week in December. We have a firm, funded offer on the house. Contingent on an inspection only and there won’t be much found. Closing date, May 29!
The urologist visit yesterday. Action, not anxiety. Always better.
The first of several plant identification classes tonight. This one is basic botany, mostly taxonomy, how to use identification manuals.
And, on Thursday, the Woolly retreat in Ely. In addition to the physical reconnection with friends–at an important juncture for me (prostate)–it will also give me a chance to reconnect with the Ely/Boundary Waters area. Superior Wolf will be richer for this trip and my motivation for working on it will go up, too.
Spring Mountain Spring Moon
Apparently the dropout rate for language instruction is incredibly high. I believe it. There were several drop out points along the way in my Latin learning, moments when the thickness of my resistance seemed impenetrable.
Read the other day that it takes 600 hours of practice to become fluent in a foreign language. The same article said that learning a language was just hard, not impossible. Now it’s beginning to appear that this article had it right.
Thing is, it seems like I have way over 600 hours of practice translating. Now this article referred to learning, say, French, and admitted that other languages like Mandarin could take much longer. Maybe fluency and accuracy in translation are different, I don’t know, but it’s taken me a long time to get where I am and that’s still far from 100%.
Like most pilgrims, the journey was key to the adventure, but the destination has proved worthy of the path. Rationales for learning Latin developed over time. One was the third phase desire to keep the brain active, creating new neural pathways. The second, or was it the original one, involved making the stories of the Metamorphoses a deep and accessible resource for writing. The third was to challenge my self-perception as one who could not learn a language.
The first I don’t know how to measure. The second has been happening all along the way and, happily, the third was a successful challenge. Challenging self-perceived limitations is an important facet of life at any age, perhaps more so as we move well into our third phase.
Spring Mountain Spring Moon
Snow last night, not much but enough to coat rooftops and give the moonshine a reflective surface in the back. The moon hung directly over Black Mountain for a couple of mornings. Here’s a fuzzy (phone) photo taken from the deck off my loft.
An odd phenomenon with shifting my workouts to the morning. I get more work done in the morning. Then, though, the afternoon, late afternoon, seems to drag.
This will become my reading time for work related material. Right now I’m studying germline gene therapy for Superior Wolf. I’m also reading an older historical fiction piece called The Teutonic Knights by Henryk Sienkiewicz. Written in 1900 it is a great read. Sienkiewicz was prolific, author of many other works of historical fiction, including Quo Vadis. The Teutonic Knights have a role to play in Superior Wolf,so that book is work related, too.
I count Latin, writing and reading to support them as work, as I do gardening and beekeeping. Some people would count these as hobbies, especially the gardening and the beekeeping, but for me they represent the non-domestic parts of my day and have done for many years now.
At least for me a day filled only with meals, leisure reading, volunteer activities, shopping would be lacking a contrast, the contrast provided by labor with a forward progression, aimed toward an end of some kind. As I wrote before, I’m learning to detach myself from the results of this work, but that doesn’t deflate its value. Hardly. Work remains key to a sense of agency, a sense that does not come from merely sustaining life. For me.
Mentioning work, Kate made me a spectacular wall-hanging with vintage Colorado postcards.
Spring Mountain Spring Moon
New morning habit in process of forming. I’m going to protect the time from 5:45-11:00 am for work with timeout for breakfast. After long experience, I know that I don’t do well if my work times get interrupted. This means I’ll need to make appointments for the afternoons in the future. Yes, this potentially interferes with my workout regimen, which begins at 4:00 pm each day. And, yes, it could disrupt my nap, but I think the advantages outweigh the hassles.
It also means I’ll not be posting here until mid-day, nor will I check e-mails, do other kinds of work on the computer until the afternoon or evening.
What will I be doing in those morning hours? Latin. Moving forward with my translation of Book VII which I plan to be my first complete book translated. There are 15. Writing. I’ll be working on Superior Wolf, writing and researching.
It’s odd, but the sunny disposition of Colorado really leans toward the outdoors, not like the cold and gloomy winters and early springs in Minnesota, where staying inside just made sense. This focus on mornings spent with the mind will have outside interference. I’ll have to focus harder on getting in hikes, plant identification, exploration in the time I have available.
I’ve been taken over the last few weeks with an idea from the Baghavad Gita, action with out attachment to the results. In the Gita this notion prunes karma, since it is the entrapment of desire that bends karma one way or the other. With no focus on the result the action cannot produce bad karma. This is not the way I see it though I understand this more orthodox approach.
Instead I find the idea of action without attachment to the result as a way to cut the final cord tying me to the bourgeois desire for achievement. It was this strain of thinking that cut across my cerebral cortex when living large popped up. In other words I learn Latin with no final end in mind. Being an amateur classicist is what I will do, defining the realm in which I will act. Just so the writing. Writing novels, being a writer is what I will do, what I have done. But the results of that action? Not important. Grandparenting. Gardening. Bee keeping. All the same.
So creating the atmosphere in which I can act is critical. Creating an atmosphere in which I succeed, not so much so.
Spring Mountain Spring Moon
Got several comments about the changes to Ancientrails. Font too small. Background made the text hard to read. No links for the title. So, I decided to try a version of the WordPress theme I’ve used before. I just wanted something fresh for Colorado. Please let me know if you find any problems here. I’ll try to fix them.
BTW: The new header is a frieze of Demeter, Persephone, Hades
Imbolc Black Mountain Moon
Signed up for 4 Colorado Native Plant Master programs: one in the foothills, one in the montane eco-system (ours) and one in the high plains. 3 of these are 3 session 8:30-12:30 classes. The fourth is a two session, 9-3, course on plant sketching. Don’t really want to qualify for the Native Plant Master program since it has requirements for volunteering that I don’t want to fulfill, but I want the content and the chance to meet some people involved in botany here.
All part of becoming native to this place. Starting this week I plan to keep a nature journal, hand-written, a record of our yard, hikes, these courses, geology lectures and field trips, meteorology notes. I’m not much of an artist, but I think with some practice I can draw plants and animals, maybe sketch geological features, at least well enough to call them to mind when I review the entries.
We drove into Evergreen for our business meeting at the Wildflower Cafe. It was good to see those folks again. Afterward we drove around Evergreen a bit, going out to the I-70 entrances and seeing in the distance snow covered peaks. Our mountains around here have snow, but are not snow covered.
Imbolc Black Mountain Moon
I’ve found my rhythms. Back at Latin, going to turn today back to Ovid from Caesar. Writing. I’m 4,000 words plus into Superior Wolf and my brain is buzzing, following trails here and there with characters, research, narrative structure. Working out is back, too, 6 days a week right now. I’m not where I was in terms of fitness, not sure how the altitude has affected me, but I’m improving and that’s the key. The whole fitness area is still in flux, but I have a pattern I’m using.
A new element, too. I’m going to make some art. Not sure what quite yet, though I’ve got some ideas and lots of material. When my center room work space gets finished, I plan to get at it. There’s also, with art, the research and work with art history, theory. Not there yet in that work, but it will come.
Even, if you managed to get through my long posts under Beyond the Boundaries, Original Relation and Reimagining Faith, you’ll know, my reimagining project has finally begun to take off. Why now I’m not sure, but there you go.
This blog, of course, has remained a constant.
Now, if we could just sell that house.
Imbolc Black Mountain Moon
One of those nights. In spite of the warmth of my electric blanket I was awake at 3 a.m. For good. So I got up, let the dogs out, fed them, but didn’t go get the paper. (too early) It’s now 5:45 and I’m planning on working on Latin as soon as I finish this. Why waste the time?
There was more snow on the deck this morning. Not so much, maybe an inch. I’d say we got 10 inches over the weekend. Snow here is both more present-it snows more often-and less. It melts soon after coming. This week the weather will be cool enough to retain the snow on the grounds, but it should be sunny enough to melt the driveway.
I’m trying to increase my work. The long preparation for, then the execution of the move, distracted me at points, especially over the last couple of months. We needed our focus on the move and that’s where it was. Now though I want to write a new book, continue the work in Ovid and Caesar, dig into art scholarship, especially in aesthetics and Song Dynasty China, and get more deeply into my Reimagining Faith project by focusing on the concept of emergence.
We have a plan for a modest garden using raised beds designed around horse watering troughs. They have a root-centric bottom up watering system and come ready to use. All we’ll have to do is site them and fill them with soil. I purchased material for a Flow Hive set-up like the one posted below, but it won’t come until November, so I’ll give the bees a pass this year. In April I take the first of several classes in a Native Plant Master program.
Exercise is two-thirds of the way back to pre-move intensity and I’ve added three days.
All this happens wrapped in regular visitation with grandchildren, Jon and Jen, going to movies, reconnoitering Denver and our immediate area around home: Jefferson County, Park County, Evergreen.
Settling in. Becoming native to this place. A process.
Imbolc Settling Moon II
Began filing today. Deciding how to organize files to support what comes next. And what does come next? Damned if I know. I’ll pass the post for the 68th time tomorrow and what is past is gone, all 67 years. That means tomorrow I start fresh. No entanglements, no regrets. Another day, the start of another year’s trip on spaceship earth.
While taking files out of the boxes used to transport them, mostly plastic rectangles with supports for hanging files, a sudden thought about a next project did come to me.
The file on the wolf hearings at the Minnesota State Legislature a few years back when de-listing the wolf (from the endangered species list) and the file on wolves as part of Minnesota’s eco-system were among the first ones I retrieved and placed in the horizontal file cabinet. They were fat with government documents, maps and material from a wolf course I took even further back at the Wolf Center in Ely. (where friend Mark Odegard’s exhibit still greets visitors)
These files, along with several books on wolves and Minnesota’s Northwoods, supported a project I’ve had in mind for a long time: Superior Wolf. Several chapters have been written, many rejected. But for some reason I could never find the right line to continue.
Superior Wolf. That’s one I really want to finish. Or, better, one I want to discover how to write. It occurred to me that the distance between those files, those early chapters and now the literal distance between me and the Minnesota Northwoods might help.
I’d like to get a novel going again and the Latin. I’m close on both counts, I think.
Once I get that filing done.