Category Archives: Reimagine. Reconstruct. Reenchant.

Life is a tale told by fallible beings…

Summer                                                                        Healing Moon

It would be easy to assume that the world is worse off now than it has ever been. Bernie Sanders calls the various smaller wars going on around the world, “World War III in segments.” There was an article in today’s NYT called for a new period of black radicalism. Not difficult to see why. The gap between the 1% and the 99% has widened, it has become not a gap but a canyon, a Grand Canyon. We can see each other across the canyon’s width but the distance is so great that the people on the other rim appear faintly, if at all.

The ocean’s acidify, the average temperature goes up, the ice caps melt and Shell Oil heads to the Arctic to drill oil wells. When the price of gas goes down a bit, Americans shift away from fuel economy to bigger and faster. Some scientists contend we are in the midst of a sixth great extinction, this one anthropogenic.

And yes, the macro view, the perspective from above, has all these things and so many more to see: poverty, epidemics, drought and water crises, forest desertification.

Yet. Men and women, men and men, women and women fall in love, get married. Babies are born, joy coming into the world with them. Children learn about the Wizard of Oz or Tin Tin or Ganesh or the Monkey King. They play in alleys, parks, war zones, schools and forests. Dreams and hopes trail in their wake like the contrails from a jet.

Here’s what I believe. We are a destructive, adaptive, mean, resilient, loving, biased species. When we push ourselves too far in war, in climate change, in racism and sexism, in concentrations of wealth and power, we take corrective actions. Clumsy and too hopeful probably, ill thought out and filled with flaws, yet with enough right to get us past the current mess.

Life is not a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury signifying nothing. Life is a tale told by fallible creatures, full of love and misguided dreams, signifying everything.

A Paradox. (more on dealing with cancer. if this bums you out, skip it.)

Summer                                                                Healing Moon

I’m sleeping fine. I don’t feel that jittery, too many cups of coffee acidity in my stomach. I know what regular anxiety feels like, having been all too familiar with it for many years. Aches in my bunched up shoulders. Uncertain about my worth, what I should do. Waves of small fear about what now seem like the silliest things. For example, will the clerks at Best Buy demand to see my driver’s license if I pay by check? And refuse to let me use the check?

So it’s easy to assume that I’m not anxious. Easy for me to assume that. Yet, if I step back a minute, I’m not writing, I’m not doing my Latin. The tomorrow wall rises more often than it falls, not allowing my thoughts and dreams past July 8th. I am, in these significant ways, distracted, not feeling well, dis-eased.

I want to be cool about this, not degenerate into the life of a patient whose every waking moment is taken up with illness, with matters of medicine. That’s no life. That’s waiting for life. Cancer is, however, hard to ignore. This is one of the more difficult struggles in my life.

Trusting the diagnosis, the treatment feels both justified (I’m confident in the pathology, the physical findings, the PSA jump. I trust Dr. Eigner’s experience and his approach.) and necessary. No second guessing, I say to myself, at this point. You know what you’re up against, you’ve weighed the options and made a decision, just let all that play out. I’m doing that. That’s why I can sleep at night, why I don’t feel those frank expressions of anxiety.

I realize, of course, the irony of writing this. It focuses on the very thing I’m saying I want to let be, but I’m living in just that paradox. I feel confident about my decisions and about the probability of their resulting in a cure. At the same time there is this part of my body that no longer participates in the general keep Charlie healthy idea. All of these things persist and tumble around in me at the same time.

This comes, too, after an interstate move complicated by what felt like a very long time to sell our Minnesota house. Becoming integrated into the family here in Colorado has not been as easy as we had hoped either. It’s getting better, we’re all learning how to appreciate each others needs and feelings, but it’s not been what we imagined, at least not at first. It has been family, with joy and travail.

Laying this down as a record, an in this moment statement of how I am. Take it for what it’s worth.

Bibliotherapy

Beltane                                                                 Healing Moon

My father’s day present from Kate is a session with the bibliotherapists at the School of Life. I’ll write more about it after I’ve had my session, but I wanted to share here the questionnaire they send out in advance. Later, I’ll post my answers. Meanwhile, these are interesting questions to ponder.

I’m seeking their thoughts on a reading plan for the next few years. Feels like my reading has gotten chaotic and I’d like to put some more heft in it. We’ll see what the process produces.

Welcome to The School of Life Bibliotherapy Service.Prior to your consultation we would appreciate it if you could take a few minutes to answer the following questions.
Name: X
Contact no: X
instructions: Please send your answers to us at:bibliotherapy@theschooloflife.com

at least 24 hours before your consultation.

We look forward to speaking with you. PLEASE let us know 24 hours in advance if for some reason you can’t make your appointment. Failure to do so may result in forfeiting your session.

 

 

 

About your reading habits
How would you describe your relationship to books?

 

X
Did books feature largely in your childhood? X
Where do you like to read? X
Why do you read? X
In a bookshop, which section do you head to first? And then? X
Which books and authors have loved most? Least enjoyed? X
Do you like the challenge of a big fat tome or do you prefer something slim? X
Do you always finish the books you start? X
In your mind, what constitutes a “good read”? X
If there were such a thing as the perfect book for you, what would it be like? X

 

 

 

About you
How old are you?

 

X
Are you single, co-habiting, married, divorced? Do you have kids? X
What do you do for a living? for fun? X
What is preoccupying you at the moment? X
What are your passions? X
What is missing from your life? X
Where do you see yourself in 10 years’ time? X

 

Beyond the tomorrow wall

Beltane                                                             New (Healing) Moon

“The cure to boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.”  Dorothy Parker

Things have begun to change internally, too. Yesterday all my various appointments for the surgery were made. That’s all I can do about prostate cancer for now. The sale of the Andover house relieved that drag on the day to day. As I reported below, planned changes are underway around the house.

Though I do still have the holter monitor until July 3rd, I’m sure the end result of all the cardiology related tests will show me in good cardiovascular health. That leaves the question of my lower oxygen saturation when on Shadow Mountain. It’s normal at Denver altitude. My take on that. Let it be until after the surgery and recovery.

With all this positive change underway, my inner compass, the one that guides me into the next work, has begun to wake up. I’m not quite ready to get back to the Latin and Superior Wolf, but I can feel tendrils of my imagination creeping out beyond the tomorrow wall. (see 6/13 post) They’re tentative, not always formed, but I know their marks, their sign.

The most reliable of these marks and signs is curiosity. How might we seed and/or otherwise nurture native flowers and plants in our yard? Where are those books on Robert Oppenheimer and the Manhattan project? Would buying a 3-D printer for Gabe and Ruth to use make sense?

Other signs. Making notes here and there for future projects. Planning new trips with Gabe and Ruth. Looking forward to visits from friends. Unpacking the remaining boxes in the garage and organizing their contents. Getting the generator installation underway. And the bookshelves and workplaces for the loft.

The tomorrow wall still stands, but small vines have begun to penetrate it seeking nourishment beyond it.

 

 

Tomorrow’s Wall

Beltane                                                                           Closing Moon

As I wrote here before, my internal timeline comes up short, now around July 8th, does not, will not extend much beyond that. This interferes with the kind of dreaming that moves projects like becoming fluent in Latin and writing a novel forward. With no time in the future-it feels walled off-there is little incentive for the incremental work necessary to move long term projects.

This is frustrating, of course, but the effect, and probably the underlying sense behind it, focuses me on the here and now. This cancer. That appointment. This work around home that needs to get done. Stay close in to the center, don’t try to project your Self and your work out ahead right now.

I trust the anxiety when it comes, as I trust the relief from it. This is not new for me, but the oscillations have become more apparent, their purposes more clear.

Surgery July 8

Beltane                                           Closing Moon

The consultation with the urologist went well. My cancer has some outside the prostate presence, which makes the situation a bit more dire, but still one within the reach of a radical prostatectomy.

Kate and I both feel good about Dr. Eigner, the surgeon/urologist, and his experience. He’s done hundreds of robotic prostatectomies and hundreds of open prostatectomies. Practice is important.

We discussed the options, from hormone treatment to radiation to surgery. The moderately advanced nature of my cancer, my age and general health (good), make me a logical candidate for surgery. Kate and I had decided that already.

On the irrational side, I want that organ out of me. It’s no longer on my side. On the rational side surgery gives me the best chance of negative margins, a procedure in which all the cancer is removed, none showing at the tissue margins.

I feel good this evening, at peace with the choice, confident in the skill of my doctor and the support of family and friends.

A Yamantaka Moment

Beltane                                                        Closing Moon

Yama
Yamantaka

So. Today is June 11th. I feel a small hole in the pit of my stomach. Not often you meet a day when your life is at stake, but this is one of those days for me. This afternoon we’ll find out the stage (severity & aggressiveness) of my cancer. We’ll also decide on a course of treatment.

It’s been an interesting time since the initial news from the biopsy. Once I absorbed that information and read the Schwartz book on Surviving Prostate Cancer, I’ve let the matter go for the most part, at least at a feeling level. There was a bracket around the time between then, late May and now, mid-June. In that bracketed time no new information could be gained and no action could be taken.

Now that bracketed time is over and the next steps, the real choices are just ahead. My confidence level is still high. Kate’s knowledge and support is essential as is encouragement from friends and family. Dr. Eigner is competent and practiced, and, unusually, open to serious questions and probing. I’ve done my research, have a list of questions.

The appointment is at 2:30. More later.

This. Well.

Beltane                                                             Closing Moon

 

A man in Kirkland, Washington, got his last wish, thanks to the compassion of the local fire district and caregivers at his hospice care center.

The patient, known simply as Ed, had been a forest ranger with a passion for the outdoors. Sadly, his illnesses forced him to stay inside for many years, and he eventually became a resident at the Evergreen Hospice Center in Kirkland. As his health waned, he shared his last wish with the hospice chaplain: To be among nature one last time.

It was important to the staff to make sure Ed was safe on his journey, so they contacted the Snohomish County Fire District to see what they could do. With a little teamwork, Ed caught a ride in an EMS vehicle to some nearby woods.

The EMS team that transported him made sure he experienced as much of the area as he could.

“Together, the group took Ed up and down the trails, bringing him the scents of the forest by touching the fragrant growth and bringing their hands close to Ed’s face,”reads a post on the Evergeen Hospice Volunteers page.

JFest

Beltane                                                            Closing Moon

 

Kate and I went to Boulder J Fest yesterday. It was on Pearl Street Mall, a three block long pedestrian mall that is the heart of downtown Boulder. We had a great time, wandering among booths that featured Jewish crafts people, Kosher food, humanist Judaism, Judaism Your Way and B’Nai Brith among many others.

We ate lunch in an excellent Italian trattoria with outdoor seating that gave us a comfortable front row seats to the performance tent. We first heard Lost Tribe, a klezmer band with extraordinary range doing everything from Bob Dylan to reggae klezmer. After they finished an acapella Orthodox group Six13 took over the stage.

Here’s a video of one of their number on youtube:

Aware

Beltane                                                                    Closing Moon

I can feel June 11th out there, pulling me toward it. An hour to an hour and a half with Dr. Eigner and Kate, deciding how to go after this disease that wants to live. It’s continued existence is, as physicians say, incompatible with life (in this case my own). Sleep comes easily and I feel confident about the possible treatments, yet there is still this sense that life runs right up to June 11th, then descends into a dark cave.

After June 11th we move from determining exactly what’s going on: staging, best approaches, options to action. A surgery date will be set. Then, the surgery itself and the recovery, which can be unpleasant, but not dangerous according to Dr. Walsh’s book. It is that transition from diagnosis and planning to the active removal of the prostate and its cancer that is the cave.

This cave is another redoubt of uncertainty. Until the surgery is complete, the pathology done and the surgeon reports, all the positive possibilities are just that, possibilities. And, of course, this is what matters most in the entire process, the results.

All my reading and Kate’s give me great odds. The testimony of friends who’ve undergone this procedure or a similar one reassures me, too. Stories of those outside my own acquaintance, but known to friends Charlie Haislet, Roy Wolf, Mark Odegard are also positive.

My heart believes all will be well. My head says yes, probably. We’ve done what we can, taken the steps necessary to make a good outcome happen. After that, then, matters move beyond my control. And I’m fine with that. Hopeful in a confident, but not sure, manner.