Still Pondering

Spring                                                                               Maiden Moon

New thoughts about old problems. My mind spins all day long, doesn’t stop at night. When I wake up, it’s not always monkey mind. Sometimes it’s just the one that wonders about reimagining faith, about what to do next in Jennie’s Dead or Superior Wolf, about the peculiar nature of this year’s primary season, about the nature of reality and life. Seems natural when I think about it this way, an extension into the night by what occupies me during the day. Of course, I still need sleep. But I get it in chunks rather than in a smooth 8 hours.

The friend problem. New information about friendship suggests that those of us who work on our own, on projects that matter to us-a lot-and especially those of us who work on creative or intellectual projects are happiest seeing friends occasionally. Most folks it seems are happiest when they see their friends often. I’ve always struggled with this idea, that I should have more friends, get out more, do more things with other people, but I’ve always gravitated to the quiet, the alone, the private.

In part this is because I am an introvert and I need private, quiet time to recharge and, conversely, find time with others enjoyable, but draining, not energizing. But, I’m also an introvert who has had, for as long as I can recall, various projects important to my own journey. Sometimes it was reading certain authors, other times researching topics like the Midwest, climate change, the Renaissance, the Enlightenment, Modernism, art history. More recently, the last 25 years or so, I’ve had specific creative projects: novels, essays, presentations for UU churches and two nonfiction works. The first non-fiction project, which is still in me, somewhere, was an ecological history of Lake Superior. The second, Reimagining Faith, remains active.

 

In retrospect I can see that the Woollies and the docents met my needs almost perfectly. I got to know others-in the case of the Woollies, deeply, and in the case of the docents, well. In both instances there were regular times for meeting, first and third Mondays with the Woollies plus an annual retreat and in the case of the docents, my touring day. Having these regular opportunities were just right for me.

Now that I’m here in Colorado, though I don’t have those regular opportunities, I still have the relationships, the friendships, from those times. So I need to make opportunities to nurture those relationships. And I have been doing that.

What I’m trying to say here is that I no longer feel less than because I’m not seeking new friends here. As I said yesterday, I imagine I’ll find some, at some point. But the bigger point is that I feel fine, happy, content as I am, at work and engaged with Kate, the dogs, family and those fine friends still in Minnesota.

 

Anchored

Spring                                                                                     Maiden Moon

Spoke by Skype with Bill Schmidt and Scott Simpson today. No reason, just catch up. It was good.

Friends. I don’t make friends easily and the almost 30 years of Woolly relationships and the 12 years for my docent friends will not be repeatable here. I’m making my peace with that, too. As long as my docent and Woolly friends will connect with me, I plan to maintain the relationships. There is an easiness, a knowingness, an intimacy that has taken years to develop with these folks.

Also, my work occupies my time, not in an escapist way, but in a fulfilling way. That’s why I don’t feel lonely here. Kate, the work, the dogs, family, casual relationships are plenty for now. And may be enough for the long haul. Even so, I imagine I will find new friends here at some point, but if I don’t, that’s ok, too.

In other words, I am flourishing as an intellectual and creative worker, lodged in a beautiful place, with family and canine companionship. I’m happy as well. A hard combination to beat.

 

 

Good Weather, Bad Weather

Spring                                                                            Maiden Moon

Exercised last night for the first time after the cortisone injection. Much better, not twinge free, but almost. This is hopeful to me, suggesting I may have, at least for a while, a means of calming the arthritis in my knee. Until it was gone, I didn’t realize how much pain and discomfort my knee had caused in my whole leg. Better living through chemicals.

There are different metrics everywhere for what constitutes good and bad weather. More snow on the way today here and more in the forecast for next week. All this is good news for the snowpack and for wildfire suppression, at least for now.  Even the dreaded hurricane has good news, too. It serves an important meteorological function, distributing fresh water over large swaths of land. I’ve not see a positive remark about tornadoes and having lived around them for a third of my life I can’t come up with one on my own. Drought seems to be like tornadoes. No good word for excessive dryness. The monsoons and their torrential rains are seen as a blessing in India.

Heavy snow in Colorado is usually a good thing, even if it causes traffic snarls and power outages. In Minnesota really heavy snow could be an inconvenience for a long time.

If the worst should come to pass, and I’m convinced it won’t, and Trump or Cruz becomes president, going to Canada or elsewhere won’t be a real option. Either of these guys would need to be fought and those of us with time and inclination will be needed. I still see no reason to doubt that Trump will get the Republican nomination-and break the party as he does-and Hillary will both get the Democratic nomination and win the presidency. Still.

Making Our Peace With Wildfires

Spring                                                                              Maiden Moon

Figured out yesterday how to use Amazon’s Unlimited Photo cloud service. It comes free with Prime. Because I put so many images in my blog, I have an unusually large number filed away for future use. I began the uploading of the photos yesterday and the service is about 2/3’rds done this morning. It will finish sometime today.

Then, I sat down and learned how to use Dropbox. It’s free storage, about 2GB, is plenty for my novels, short stories, essays. I started copying files there yesterday, too. It will take a little time, but once I’m done, I’ll just have to update whatever current work I’m doing.

These two are in anticipation of a possible wildfire. No need to lose your work these days.

Today I’m going to work on putting together our emergency kit which will include the memory card which has the photographs of all our stuff. In there will also go insurance policies, titles, deed and manuals for various things since they will testify to exactly what we own. Our estate documents and our living wills. That sort of thing.

After a year of trying to put together an external sprinkler system, I’ve decided to not pursue it. Why? Well, for one thing nobody here builds the kind of simple system I want. I’ve investigated all the possible vendors in the state. That would mean I’d have to work with somebody who didn’t know what they were doing. Which would make two of us.

Perhaps even more to the point, I read an article by a wildfire expert who said that if you follow the firewise zone recommendations, which I am, that most houses will survive a fire. The deputy chief of the Elk Creek Fire district said that our house was well situated to survive a fire, in large part because we have a short, level driveway on a primary road, Black Mountain Drive. The perception of the fire department is important because during a fire they drive through the area and in essence do triage. These homes will be ok on their own. These can survive if we protect them. These homes will burn. You want to be in the first two categories. And we are no matter the sort of fire.

ECFD LOGO

Also, I decided to make my peace with losing our house and garage. After I finish the fire mitigation work, taking down trees and making sure we have a our zone free of combustibles around the house, I’m going to rely on luck and the Elk Creek Fire Protection District. Should that not prove enough and we lose everything except our lives and the lives of our dogs, we’ll build again. What could be safer than an area that’s already burned out?

It felt freeing to come to this decision. Both Kate and I agreed that losing our stuff would be very, very far from a cataclysm. We could rebuild an energy efficient house suited to our needs.

All part of settling in.

 

OMG!

Spring                                                                                     Maiden Moon

Blew the driveway twice in the same day for the first time this winter. Not sure how much snow we got, but the water content is very high. A good thing. Maybe 1 foot, maybe a bit less. (between 16 & 20 inches, actually) Knee held up through both times. Good sign, I think.

Head spinning as I read political news. Jeb Bush endorses Ted Cruz. Apparently some young shrub in Texas may be the next hedge hope for the White House and he’ll need Cruzian support. Cruz himself wants a police guard on Muslim neighborhoods in the U.S. Trump would close our borders until we got things sorted out. Like watching a building demolition in slow motion, seeing the Republican party try to make sense of the mess they have wrought.

Knee, Snow, Travel

Spring                                                                                         Maiden Moon

The knee, 20 hours later. Feeling pretty good. Almost normal. A bit creaky, a little twingey, but otherwise, pretty damned good. The cortisone effect can last from weeks to months. I’m hoping months. The big issue with the knee, beyond Asia, is my regular workout. High intensity workouts, which I’ve been doing for a while, require some speedier, more stressful moments on the treadmill. The cortisone will make them easier for now. Worth it.

In other news here on Shadow Mountain we’re getting what may well may be another foot of snow. And this stuff is wet. And therefore heavy. Of course it’s Wednesday, when the trash goes out. Gonna get the yellow Cub Cadet out, but if it plugs up all the time, I’ll wait for the solar snow shovel or find somebody to plow us out.

Up here the forecast can change quickly if a system moves a bit further north or south. Last night the forecasts were for 2-7 inches. But in reality.

Today, and maybe tomorrow, is going to be largely trip related. Finish photographing our stuff. Get necessary information onto a flash drive for portability. Open a dropbox account to put my writing in the cloud. Get our emergency box of important papers put together. Sign up for international cell phone plans. Figure out how folks can contact us when necessary. Fussy stuff.

 

Black Mountain White

Imbolc                                                                                Maiden Moon

snow on the 19thBlack Mountain is white. I can see it out of two windows here and its looming shape, it’s about 1500 feet higher than our altitude here on Shadow Mountain, blends in with the sky. The lodgepole pines and the few aspen that cover it are snow covered. The mountains, which seem-and are-the definition of stability and bulk still surprise me by how frequently they change appearance. In the fog Black Mountain disappears. After a heavy snow it changes color, becomes different from its green and rocky self. At night, if Bishop Berkeley was right, it goes away, only to return in the morning light.

(Black Mountain is above the trees on the left)

In the fall aspen light up its elevations, gold against green. The green becomes more vivid.

The Front Range is a physical barrier to a traveler from the east as they head west along the 40th parallel. It marks the end of the Great Plains and does so in a sudden upsweep of rock. Those of us raised in the humid east find ourselves in a new, startlingly new, land. A big part of the fun of being here.

Staying With It

Imbolc                                                                     Maiden Moon

Latin. If I plotted my feelings on a graph, they would look like a roller coaster. Yesterday I read my written translations, rather than trying to pick my way through a sentence without consulting what I’d done in the previous couple of weeks. Very goods and atta boys. That made me feel more confident. Consulting the English after I translate a sentence has made me better.

It’s still about plateaus. This one is nearer to the goal than I’ve ever been. My skill is mostly adequate, with substantial help from the commentary and using English translations to make me rethink my work when necessary.

I’ve invested so much time in this project that I want to continue. Not an easy decision, but since I wrote about this a while back, I’ve made progress on my novels and on Reimagining while continuing to translate 5 or so verses a day. Switching my work flow to novels and Reimagining first, then Latin adjusted my work day to my priorities. Feels much better.