• Category Archives Third Phase

  • Country Club Living

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall                                                                     Harvest Moon

    Just back from Golden Valley Country Club.  Not my usual haunt.  This was a luncheon put on by our financial manager, RJ Devick et al.  Interesting presentation by a guy from JP Morgan saying that the economic outlook has good spots:  corporate profits, medium spots:  growth and jobs and medium to weak but improving:  housing.  He foresees continued growth and a genuine wrestling with the country’s financial situation after the election.  The economy has improved every year under Obama’s administration and the deficit has shrunk.

    Also, a presentation on metabolic medicine by a very sharp woman doc.  Will probably be taking some of her recommendations by mouth.

    Both of these presentations were worthwhile but neither the setting nor the crowd were mine.  A lot of nervous retirees focused on the bad in the economy and the bad in their health.  Good way to generate gloom.  Bah, humbug.


    Health Retirement Third Phase

  • Mabon and the Fall Equinox

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Fall                                                                                           Harvest Moon (I changed this name when I discovered the Harvest Moon was the closest full moon to the Fall Equinox)

     

    Autumn
    by T. E. Hulme

    A touch of cold in the Autumn night
    I walked abroad,
    And saw the ruddy moon lean over a hedge
    Like a red-faced farmer.
    I did not stop to speak, but nodded;
    And round about were the wistful stars
    With white faces like town children.

     

    My thoughts

    This Equinox I’m offering some resources from around the web that speak to this, the second harvest holiday.  This is the liturgical fall, as I said yesterday, as opposed to the meteorological fall which occurs September 1st.

    The crone aspect of this holiday strikes me especially this year.  Why?  Because it honors the triple goddess [maid-mother-crone] in her final form of three. The final form, that is, until the new year begins. She begins the year as the maid, shifts with the beginning of the growing season into the mother and then, with the coming of fall enters the crone.

    I don’t go further with the triple goddess idea (from Robert Graves) than its emphasis on the seasons recapitulating  the main phases of human life.  In this way the fall turn of the goddess into the crone, the wise woman/healer, marks the seasonal reminder of the Third Phase.

    My own version of the three is:  Student, Family (householder in the Hindu tradition), Third Phase (retirement in the Hindu tradition, but in a different sense than our own, about which there is no cultural consensus.  Hence, for me, the third phase).  The crone encourages an inflection in the third phase that I like i.e., a sense of fulfillment, of gathered wisdom, of grace gained from an expected and welcomed transition.

    This is also the season of age passing onto death.  Death marks the end of the third phase and since it does, preparation for dying is an essential aspect of the third phase.  An essential, perhaps the only essential, realization here is that death is and that it comes for us all.  Though essential, this is a truth difficult to grasp in its deeply personal sense and once grasped, to accept.  It requires wisdom, patience and gentle resignation, all characteristic of the crone as I have come to understand her.

    She could just as well be he.  A wise old man, the one on the block that others come to.

    This is the season of harvest.  Enjoy the fruits of your labors.

    Mabon

    Aging Goddess

    The triple Goddess – worshipped by the Ancient Britons, is now in her aspect of the aging Goddess and passes from Mother to Crone, until she is reborn as a youthful virgin as the wheel of nature turns.
    At the Autumn equinox the goddess offers wisdom, healing and rest.

    Apples
    To honour the dead, it was also traditional at Mabon to place apples on burial cairns, as symbolism of rebirth and thanks. This also symbolizes the wish for the living to one day be reunited with their loved ones.
    Mabon is also known as the Feast of Avalon, deriving from the meaning of Avalon being, ‘the land of the apples’.

    Mabon Traditions

    The Wicker man
    There was a Celtic ritual of dressing the last sheaf of corn to be harvested in fine clothes, or weaving it into a wicker-like man or woman. It was believed the sun or the corn spirit was trapped in the corn and needed to be set free. This effigy was usually burned in celebration of the harvest and the ashes would be spread on the fields.

    ‘The reaping is over and the harvest is in,
    Summer is finished, another cycle begins’

    In some areas of the country the last sheaf was kept inside until the following spring, when it would be ploughed back into the land. In Scotland, the last sheaf of harvest is called ‘the Maiden’, and must be cut by the youngest female in attendance.

    To close:  a prayer, written by Kathleen Jenks of the wonderful website Myth*ing Links:

    Kathleen was a professor at Pacifica and is now a private consultant.

    As autumn returns to earth’s northern hemisphere,
    and day and night are briefly,
    but perfectly,
    balanced at the equinox,
    may we remember anew how fragile life is —-
    human life, surely,
    but also the lives of all other creatures,
    trees and plants,
    waters and winds.May we make wise choices in how and what we harvest,
    may earth’s weather turn kinder,
    may there be enough food for all creatures,
    may the diminishing light in our daytime skies
    be met by an increasing compassion and tolerance
    in our hearts.
     

    Warmly,

    Kathleen

     


    Faith and Spirituality Great Wheel Third Phase

  • Medicine

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Lugnasa                                                     Garlic Planting Moon

    Back from my pre-op physical for hernia surgery.  Questions, palpitations, blood pressure, blood and ekg.  Looks like I’m cleared to go.

    (Hippocrates Teaching)

    Having someone cut on my body, especially paying somebody to cut on my body, is not at the top of my list of things to do.  Still, needs to be done.  So.

    The whole medical system works well for those of us who have decent insurance and buy into the Western model of care and treatment.  But, even for us, it is cumbersome, overly complicated and very, very far from transparent.

    Still.  Having competent docs and hospitals does make me feel much more secure as I age, particularly if I lay Minnesota health care over against, say, Indiana.  We’re in a sweet spot here when it comes to medicine and I’m grateful for that.

     


    Health Retirement Third Phase

  • Seeing Ourselves Through the Eyes of Others

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Lugnasa                                                       Garlic Planting Moon

    Just read a very interesting couple of threads on Quora about how persons from other cultures view US culture.   What’s most interesting  to me is the reveal achieved by others, showing us aspects of our common life, aspects we pay little attention to (the most likely reservoir of culture, BTW), for example:

    American culture and society is a naturally high-trust society.

    …religious diversity here has made me realize how many south american customs are rooted in catholicism,

    and on this set of questions on another thread:  What parts of American culture are not easily understood by foreigners?  The list below is a composite from individual answers in this thread:

    The view of American peculiarities depends on the cultural origin of the respondent.

    What is generally found peculiar:

    • Permissive gun laws
    • Lawsuits
    • Euphemisms
    • Individualism
    • Resistance to the metric system
    • Fashion: chiefly ugly footwear

    What Asians find more peculiar:

    • Less filial piety – disrespect for the elderly
    • “Cutting off” children upon adulthood
    • Manners: Small talk, sarcasm, showing off, pitching
    • Protecting individual rights to an extreme
    • Blurry social hierarchy
    • The notion that you can be happy without success
    • “Going Dutch” and tipping in restaurants
    • Drinking ice water year-round
    • Overmedication

    What Europeans find more notable:

    • Manners: Exclamative language and loudness, enthusiasm, friendliness, liberal use of humour
    • Moral contradictions
    • Social injustice: healthcare, unemployment payments
    • Politics: Tolerance for lobbying, the Right Wing, the election system
    • Psychological traits: high trust, self-deprecation, diversity, openness
    • A culture of meetings
    • Sports
    • Subtitles instead of dubbing
    • Restaurants: boxing leftovers, waiting in line

    Note: This list is to be treated as merely an index of motifs found in the answers below and does not attempt to construct a stereotype. Each item here should be read in context with the rationale of the individual answers where it is found

    More on this later.

     


    Family Humor Politics Third Phase US History

  • Meaning

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Lugnasa                                                         Full Garlic Moon

    It may, in the end, come down to this.  How much does writing mean?  Does it mean enough to draw me away from other things I love?  This question has a lot of baggage.

    First of all, I’ve had my chance.  22 years of chances, supported by a beautiful and gracious wife.  Nothing’s happened in the publishing end of my work.  It’s not that I haven’t tried; but, it’s also not like the manuscripts have flown out as, like homing pigeons, they came back to roost.  They always came back home.

    None of the manuscripts, six in all counting Missing, and not counting the four I have substantially underway, but unfinished, have gotten that second and third and fourth revision.  No, I’ve succumbed to a real temptation.  Finish a draft and then chase after the next idea in a tight red skirt that comes along.  With Missing I’m trying to rectify that.

    I’ve given up. Third piece of luggage.  Maybe the heaviest of all. I let the fear rise up and overwhelm me.  And, I just quit writing.  No writing, no failure.  Right?  Wrong.  There’ve been sine waves of passion, followed by fear and troughs of melancholy, anxiety.  Unlike Rembrandt, a real artistic hero, I’ve let life stop me.  No, wait.  That’s not true.  I’ve let me stop me.

    Age has crept up  on me.  When I started this turn away from the ministry, it was 1991.  Now it’s 2012.  A different century.  Hell, a different millennia.  In the intervening years the hourglass has inverted.  I wasn’t young in 1991.  I’m a lot more not younger now.  The question here is, do I dare commit myself, my life and my time, again, with death no longer a distant call?

    There is more, here, too.  The Indian’s see life in four phases:  student, householder, hermit, ascetic.  As soon as your children have your first male grandchild, it is time to pull back from work and to focus on religious life, first as a hermit, still at home, later, leaving home and connections to begin living life as a wandering religious.

    The question this raises for me is this:  Does the third phase (I’m not an Indian, so I’m throwing out the whole ascetic idea.  Wouldn’t last long in a Minnesota winter anyhow.) really, that is appropriately, suggest a turn away from striving and a turn toward the spiritual?  In other words, is a commitment like the one I’m thinking of reviving come simply at the wrong time?  Worse, could it impede a journey I need to take?

    Gonna let all this percolate, as Kate likes to say.  Look for the other side tomorrow. or later tonight.

     


    Third Phase Writing

  • In the Jungles of Northern Andover

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Lugnasa                                                        Garlic Planting Moon

    Living out here, in the wilds of exurban Andover is very peaceful.  Quiet, except for the neighbors who occasionally try out their motorcycles and dirt bikes on our street–not all that often.  Spacious, we have one hectare or 2.5 acres with woods, flower and vegetable beds and an orchard, plus a large reasonably useless yard.  Roomy, with rooms for Kate’s sewing and quilting, exercise, reading and for my writing and study.  Memories, we’ve been here 18 years and have many birthdays, Thanksgivings and holidays in our past plus visits from the kids and grandkids and all the dogs.

    Yet peaceful has its limits.  When we met last night with all the Woolly wives and discussed books on a clear, comfortable evening, it was wonderful.  The buzz, the casual conversation, the different personalities.  People I’ve known for years, shared intimate parts of their lives.  That we don’t have out here.

    I’ve never found my people in Anoka County, though I love it out here.  That’s partly because I’ve refused to give up my urban connections, working in politics for the Sierra Club, volunteering at the MIA, visiting museums, meeting with the Woollies.  It’s partly because I’m an introvert and starting over with new friends is tough for me.  It’s partly because my politics don’t have company here.

    I suppose another way to look at this is that I have the best of both worlds, a peaceful refuge and cosmopolitan friends.  I’ll stick with that one for now.

     

     

     


    Art and Culture Friends Garden Politics Third Phase

  • An Annual Visit to our Money

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Summer                                                                 Hiroshima Moon

    Back from visiting our money at Bond and Devick.  Turns out the corpus breathes.  RJ Devick, the owner now of a firm started by Kate’s friend, Penny Bond, is a sharp guy with a keen understanding of finance and politics, a necessary union of skills.

    We have our money in a largely conservative portfolio, one aimed at doing a little better when the market goes up and not so bad when the market goes down.  We’re trying to stay within 4% as our drawdown, so that plus pension (mine) and social security (both of us) represents our income stream.   We have some savings outside of the IRA, but the amount is small compared to the IRA.

    Managing this money towards our retirement has required and requires our mutual attention.  We got a lot better at all of this about ten years ago, when we had a rude, unpleasant episode with a pre-collapse (of the US economy) debt load.  The message got through however and now we are fine in retirement.  Not fat, but not needy either.

    Our situation is so much more fortunate than many of our contemporaries who will head into the post-retirement world with little savings.


    Family Retirement Third Phase

  • I’m So Glad

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Beltane                                     Garlic Moon

    Be Glad You Exist, the Greek inscription I mentioned a few posts ago, got me thinking.  A persistent prod in American culture is the I’m not doing that well enough, or fast enough, or soon enough or with the right attitude.  Not studying enough, eating too much, not working enough, not working out enough, not relaxing, not being charitable enough or financially successful enough.

    It’s an argument from lack that has as its premise that jockey metaphor I came up with a month or so ago.  In case you forgot, I did until just now, I suggested that many of us take on board, sometime in childhood, a jockey who rides us, rides us hard, always pushing us toward the next, the better, the hoped for, the not yet achieved.

    This argument from lack is the jockey’s prod, his quirt that comes out when he senses flagging will or decreasing purpose.

    But, what if Be Glad You Exist was the baseline?  Just that.

    Then we might start not from a place of lack but from a place of adding, of completing, of maturing, of enriching.  Moving ourselves not with the lash, but with a model more like Maslow’s where the underpinning opens new possibilities, like the emergence of the butterfly, say, from the caterpillar.  A caterpillar is not a lesser butterfly, but its necessay precursor.

    Orienting ourselves this way (I realize I’m writing about myself here, but maybe a bit about you, too.) does not require the scorched earth of bad diet, bad language skills, inadequacy of any kind; rather, it could have Be Glad You Exist as the ground of our being.  Sounds like a good thing to me.


    Aging Faith and Spirituality Feelings Humanities Reimagine. Reconstruct. Reenchant. Third Phase

  • Searching for Ovid

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Beltane                                    Garlic Moon

    Ovid on the third phase:  At times it is folly to hasten at other times, to delay. The wise do everything in its proper time.

    Searching for Ovid.  Gone now.  2000 years ago.  An unhappy man, yet he went on, did not stop, wrote, lived.

    Of course, his statue is here.  He looks suitably serious, dignified, the man some Romanians take as their first national poet.  But what of the man, not bronze?

    If I limit myself to the Roman mosaic, the material objects in the museum, the remains of the wall across from Hotel Class, the ruins of the homes and the butcher shop, the promontory views from the high coastline overlooking the Pontus Euxinus, the Marea Negra; if I image Ovid carrying a small oil lamp to light his way and his night, drinking from the glass vessels in the museum, turning a cynical educated Roman eye towards depictions of gods and goddesses; getting water from the clay and lead pipes also on display, walking over those intricate mosaics while looking out at the sea, a slave stigiling off his sweat and dirt with the small curved tool I saw here, then I have begun to see him.

    To populate this place in the very early 1st century a.c.e., to get the small things right and the people and the matters under consideration, I wonder how much that would take, how much research?  A lot, I imagine.  Still, it would be worth it, if the time was available.  Why?  Oh, for the same reason, evoking 2012 Bucresti is worth it.  Because we’re strange creatures, but often the same and we can reach across time and space to be with each other.  That’s a gift and it makes us more.


    Humanities Latin Literature Third Phase Translating Metamorphoses Travel

  • A Third Phase Entry: Learning How to Die

    Posted on by Charles Comment

    Beltane                                              New Garlic Moon

    Whew.  Over to Riverfalls (east into Wisconsin, about an hour) for Warren’s father’s funeral.  Then, in rush hour, out to St. Louis Park for the Woolly meeting this month at the Woodfire Grill. (west of the Cities)  So much driving.

    Funerals.  The wedding equivalent of our age range.  We meet friends there, catch up, honor the family and the final journey.  Then we go home, secretly glad we were attending another funeral, not being featured.

    Though.  We agreed tonight, Mark, Scott, Bill, Frank and myself, that what we learn from Moon’s recent death, Warren’s father and mother, Sheryl’s father and mother, Bill and Regina’s confrontation with cancer, is how to die.  It is the end of this phase of life as surely as a degree ended the first phase, career and family the second.

    It is this that changed at our retreat two weeks ago.  We acknowledge and are ready to learn how to die.  And how to live until we do.  It is a joy and a true blessing to have men ready to walk down this ancientrail together.  And to be one of them.


    Aging Faith and Spirituality Feelings Retirement Third Phase 📎and tagged