Category Archives: Family

On the Way

March 29, 2014 Charles 1 Comment

Spring New Bee Hiving Moon

Ruth has gone home. Gabe has gone home. Jon has gone home. Jen has gone home. The last of the trip’s intentions are now over. All that remains is for me to go home.

Tomorrow morning, breakfast, then in the car for the next to last day. This Ford Focus is a good car. It’s set up well for a road trip. I’ve gotten 35 mpg on average.

Trips have their own rhythms and this one has begun to turn toward home and away from traveling; now it’s a return. Returns do not have the anticipation of new adventures, new sights, but they do have something better. Returns take us home. It is only with home in mind that we can set off with confidence into the unknown. Home is the known, the safe place, the refuge.

It’s where Kate is. Where Vega, Rigel and Gertie are. Where the gardens and the orchard are. Where the study is. Where most of life happens. I’m ready to get home.

Family, Travel

Magical

March 29, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Spring Hare Moon

Several hours with granddaughter Ruth. She asks questions from her much despised car seat while the car hums on asphalt, these old ears not able to pick up much of the high pitched chatter. It tests my intelligence to appear to be listening. I want to, but even the good ear doesn’t allow it.

Once in a while: “Question. Grandpop, have you finished your book?” Yes, I have and its out to agents right now. “Agents.” They try to sell your book for you. “Oh. Does it have any pictures?” Nope. “I’ve gotten really good at visualizing when I’m reading. Question. (she actually says, question) How long is it?” About 100,000 words. “Is 100, 000 more than a million?” No, it takes 10 100,000’s to make a million. “Oh. Well, if I read your book ten times, I would get a million word medal.”

We went to the Colorado History Museum which has changed to visitor friendly exhibits. Good for kids, a bit disappointing for me. Ruth loves to set the pattern of the dynamite in a mining demonstration, then push the plunger. The patterns are complex and she remembers them perfectly each time.

Time with grandkids has a magical quality and I think it’s partly because the issue of mortality is so squarely and honestly on the table. I’ll die long before Ruth and we both know that. It gives these times together a depth and seriousness that rides below the surface of ice cream cones and bagels.

Her world is bicycles, books and imminent release from her car seat. Mine is love, legacy and creativity. Probably not that different in their essence.

And she wore me out. Time for a nap.

Art and Culture, Bees, Faith and Spirituality, Family, Friends, Garden, Latin, MOOCS, Reimagine. Reconstruct. Reenchant., Third Phase, Translating Metamorphoses, Writing

Now

March 22, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Spring Hare Moon

The first of three workshops has finished. This one, life context, positions you in the current period of your life. It’s been, as always, a moving and insight producing time. These workshops move below the surface and defy easy summary, but I have had one clear outcome from this one. I’m in a golden moment.

I’m healthy, loved and loving. Kate and I are in a great place and the kids are living their adult lives, not without challenges, but they’re facing those. The dogs are love in a furry form.

The garden and the bees give Kate and me a joint work that is nourishing, enriching and sustainable. We’re doing it in a way that will make our land more healthy rather than less.

The creative projects I’ve got underway: Ovid, Unmaking trilogy, reimagining faith, taking MOOCs, working with the Sierra Club, and my ongoing immersion in the world of art have juice. Still.

I have the good fortune to have good friends in the Woollies and among the docent corps (former and current). Deepening, intensifying, celebrating, enjoying. That’s what’s called for right now.

Family, Feelings, Memories

24 Years and Still in Love

March 10, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Hare Moon

Sometimes, not often, but sometimes an event matches its purpose. Tonight’s anniversary dinner was such an event. We arrived at the Nicollet Island Inn at 6 pm, the same place where, 24 years ago, we spent the night before boarding a PanAm (yes, PanAm, can you imagine?) flight for Rome.

The host knew it was our anniversary, took us to our table after complimenting us on our glasses and our colorful garments and pointed to the bouquet on the table. “You are loved,” he said to Kate. “24 years and still in love?” Yes, we nodded. “Wonderful. Have a great evening.” We did.

We thanked our taste in classical music, our seats at the St. Paul Chamber Orchestra for bringing us together. We looked at the things that could have gone badly like Kate earning a lot and me earning much less, then nothing. I said, “I think the thing we’ve done, all along, is nurture the best in each other. I don’t see how you can ask for more in a relationship.” Kate agreed. Somehow we have seen the highest and best in each other, staying out of each other’s way in some instances, stepping in with a helping hand at others.

(in Pizarro’s dining room, Lima, Peru)

Kate ordered the scallops; I went for the tenderloin. We both ate less than half, saving some for tomorrow. I set aside my low carb focus to have a chocolate tart for dessert. We finished smiling. Kate slid over and put her arm through mine.

Added to the bill were two Nicollet Island Inn mugs, memories of the evening of our 24th.

Next year in Hawai’i!

Aging, Family, Retirement, Third Phase

24

March 10, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Hare Moon

Nicollet Island Inn tonight for our 24th anniversary dinner.

Marriage is an interesting institution and not an obvious one. There is certainly no need for marriage as a means of assuring reproduction. There is ample evidence that monogamy grinds against some people all of the time and most people some of the time. The notion of finding someone in your twenties with whom you will be compatible in your sixties is almost laughably difficult. Of course, that problem can be solved. First, a divorce. Second, capitulation. Third, growing along with each other.

I’ve done the first, would find the second constitutionally impossible and now, thankfully, have ample evidence that the third is an option, too. Even marrying in our forties, as Kate and I did, doesn’t necessarily augur well for life together in old age. Why not? Well, forty somethings getting married are still in their working years, burdened and shaped by the demands of occupation and vocation.

After the work life recedes, there’s no guarantee that the two will still want to see each other across the breakfast and lunch and dinner table.

Kate and I have made this transition over the last couple of years, integrating our lives in a more closely choreographed dance. Now, when I work here in my study, her sewing machine whirs above me, her feet move across the floor from table to ironing board as she works on her current project. When we look at travel opportunities, we can be much more flexible in our decisions. As the growing season unfolds, so will another year of mutual garden work, growing food, caring for the bees.

We didn’t know we’d be good at this when we got married. It wasn’t on our minds. But that third option, the growing together one? It’s marked every step along the pilgrimage of our life together, a pilgrimage far from finished.

Faith and Spirituality, Family, Feelings, Humanities, Reimagine. Reconstruct. Reenchant., Retirement, Third Phase, Travel

Coming Up in March

March 6, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Hare Moon

Looking down the month toward our 24th anniversary (Monday) and the date I’m wheels on the road for Tucson (the 18th). 24 years with Kate and our relationship improves like fine wine, gaining more nuance and depth, more body with each passing year. This year we return to the Nicollet Island Inn for dinner, the spot from which we launched our honeymoon. As spring rolled forward in March of 1990 those three weeks in Europe were as good a beginning as the marriage itself. Next year we’ll celebrate our 25th anniversary at Mama’s Fish House on Maui.

The Tucson trip grows closer. These rolling retreats, as I like to think of alone time behind the wheel, are really just road trips. Road trips are part of the American way, peregrinatio updated for the age of the internal combustion engine.

This one of course has its focus self discovery, focus, personal deepening so it will have a more spiritual note, but it will also include my usual visits to spots of natural and historic interest. Among the possibilities are Carlsbad Caverns, the Saguaro forests, a state park or two in Arizona, the Sonoran Desert Museum, Mt. Kitt, Chaco Canyon, Joshua Tree National Park (probably not, but it’s within reach) and a second visit to the Arbor Day lodge and farm in Nebraska City, Nebraska.

Dogs, Family, Minnesota

Careening Out of February

February 23, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Valentine Moon

The dogs were quiet this morning. I slept in until 8:30. When I came out to the kitchen, they looked up at me, happy to see me and I let them outside. Gertie, our self-anointed early morning canine agitator, was quiet this morning. Why? No idea. She has slept in her crate the last two nights rather than in our bedroom. Maybe that explains some of it. Whatever it was, I’d like to see it again tomorrow.

(Gertie’s got her head out the furthest.)

After the worst snow event since the 1991 Halloween blizzard, we’re settling into another week of polar vortex style cold. Looks like we’re going to slide out of February on a Red Bull crashed-ice course.

Over the last day or so the snow lining the branches of the shrubs and trees has begun to melt in the now much warmer sun, more light on less square feet of earth. As it melts, though, it freezes back because the air temperature around it is still way below freezing. This has created some beautiful instances of clear ice topped snow, as if many of the snow-covered branches have sprouted diamond tiaras. Now presenting, Miss Euonymus. And for Miss Congeniality, the entrant from the oak hill, Miss Dogwood.

Kate’s going to stay at the quilt retreat an extra night so she can watch the Winter Olympics’ closing ceremonies. I’ll go get her tomorrow morning, after the roads have cleared. I’ve sat out the entire storm, taking Kate up to Rogers late morning on Thursday, then sitting right here, where I plan to stay until I leave to get her tomorrow.

Family, Garden, Great Work, Health, Our Land and Home

A Letter To Saudi Arabia

February 22, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Valentine Moon

Brother Mark, within a hundred miles of the Rub al Kahli, the empty quarter, asked me about the winter and the garden. Here’s my reply:

It has been our most severe winter since 1978-79, which was only 8 years after I moved up here. We just got 10 inches of snow and the temperatures are headed back down. It’s 2 right now and we have -15 for a low forecast this Thursday. Snow in our front yard is as high as my hip. The raised beds in the vegetable garden have disappeared.

All the dogs are good right now. Gertie gets around much better since she had the surgical crimp removed from her left rear knee.

Kate’s away at quilting retreat with her sister Anne. Just me, the dogs and lots of snow.

Last year I began using products from International Ag Labs and they increased our production even though I used them for only part of the season. The broadcast fertilizer went down fall and this spring I add nitrogen. There’s also a transplant formula to use when planting. These products improved the microbial life in the soil and add minerals found missing through soil tests. I tested the vegetable garden and the orchard last fall.

International Ag labs moves gardens and farms toward sustainable agriculture by creating healthy soil. This has always made sense to me and I’m pleased to have found them. Bill Schmidt found them.

Over this weekend I plan to place my seed and plant orders. Once I’ve done that I can order nitrogen in forms specific for specific plants. This means I will no longer have to rotate my crops because I’m building soils designed optimally for each plant type.

Tomatoes, beets, cucumbers, melons, bush beans, sugar snap peas, leeks, greens, herbs and peppers. The garlic’s already in the ground. This fall I’ll plant scallions at the same time I plant garlic.

The orchard is part of the program this year. That means I’ll be spraying the trees as well as the vegetables. These are foliar feedings, not insecticides. That’s a weekly, sometimes twice-weekly job. There, are, too soil drenches every other week.

Aren’t you glad you asked?

Art and Culture, Family

Aside February 20, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Valentine Moon

Took Kate up to Rogers, the Hampton Inn there. She’s in her room, napping as the snow falls. Her sister, Annie, will be coming up later. It’s a quilting retreat. Which, literally, is what it is. That is, the quilters come together, bring all their own stuff-sewing machines, stash, other projects, food-and sew on things they would do at home. It’s a group mentoring experience where problems get worked out, praise is given and a sense that you’re not in this quilting thing alone is nurtured. (The Quilting Frolic 1813 John Lewis Krimmel)

Asia, Family, Travel

You Canceled It For What?

February 16, 2014 Charles Leave a comment

Imbolc Valentine Moon

Sister Mary had a chance to keynote a conference on education. She’s spoken at several conferences, but never keynoted before. An honor. But.

She wrote that her flight to the island of Java had been canceled and she would not be able to make it to the conference. Why? Volcanic eruption. Mt. Kelud. (see right)

It grounded planes and caused tens of thousands of people to flee. I wrote back and said that was a new one for this flatlander, located mid-continent. Snow, yes. Ice, yes. Even flooding. But volcanic eruption? Quite the exotic reason for cancellation sitting in Minnesota. Not so exotic in Indonesia, a very volcanically active and earthquake active region of the world. It is, too, the fourth largest nation in the world by population.

Where is Mt. Kelud?