Category Archives: White Supremacy

Gabe

Mabon and the Harvest Moon

Sunday gratefuls: Gabe. His “Twenty-Five Years of Ink”. The Crawling Crab. RTD. Back Pain. Hip Pain. Tramadol. Acetaminophen. Nerve ablation. Rides. Tara. Jamie. Kate, always Kate. Frost tonight. Rain. Israel. Palestinians. Ross Douthat. Ezra Klein. Hard Fork. The New York Times. The Washington Post.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: The Grandkids

Life Kavannah: Wu Wei

Week Kavannah:  Simcha.  Joy.     Aspen Gold against Lodgepole Green.

Tarot: Paused

One brief shining: Lunch came in plastic bags, one to Gabe filled with Snow Crab in a hot sauce, one to me with peeled Shrimp and, for some reason, Mussels, boiled Corn on the Cob, two servings of Garlic toast, which we upended onto the white waxed paper our waiter had put down. Yum. The Crawling Crab.

 

Gabe: Gabe took the RTD to the Lakewood-Wadsworth stop where I waited inside the parking structure, using my handicap  placard for the very first time. When he came down the stairs, I flashed my lights. In his hand he carried stapled pages which contain his expanded version of a short story he wrote earlier this year.

We had lunch plans at the Crawling Crab. See above. He has, he said, sent off four college applications, and would finish a fifth yesterday. These were all instate including CSU Boulder. Out of state come next. University of Iowa and its well known creative writing program is his first choice. Hamline University in St. Paul his second.

A high school senior Gabe has English, Civics (borrring), Ceramics, Stagecraft, and something else I’m not remembering. He has found many classes boring over his high school years, although he loves Religious Studies, which is his second idea for a major after creative writing.

“Then I might have a crisis like Ruthie, and change my major anyway.” You just never know.

Always good to see the grandkids.

Big wreck had traffic on 285 moving forward soo slowly, both lanes filled as far as I could see ahead. Not much fun when the hip has taken over for the left leg as a primary purveyor of pain. I wanted to get home.

 

Just a Moment: Saw a Swastika on Nextdoor Shadow Mountain. A big one. Placed on a hill visible to traffic on I-70. Read the comments, all of them. With the exception of a couple of “free speech” advocates-who don’t understand that hate speech is not protected-I felt gratified to see condemnation.

An extra charge of emotion seeing this. More than an abstract repulsion, something more personal. Over breakfast on Friday with Alan and Joanne the holocaust came up, as it often will when talking to children of survivors. This generation of Jews, my generation, often have parents or grandparents who fled Europe or were in the camps at the end of the war.

On occasion we have the conversation, often stimulated by events like the big swastika. Is it time to go? Where would we go? Costa Rica. Canada. Latin America. Because those who lived through late 1930’s Germany feel the same bad moon rising.

Most of my friends say they’re too old to move. Me, too.

 

 

 

Rise of the Zombie Mean Guys

Lughnasa and the Cheshbon Nefesh Moon

Thursday gratefuls: Tom. Here. (I think.) Ruth and her chemistry test. Gabe and Gabe knowledge. Maddie. Palliative care. Shadow and her toys. Aggressive chewers. Artemis and her children, headed for a coming frost. The attempt to ignore the first amendment. A world changing so, so fast. Labrum tears and steroid injections. Back pain relief coming in October. Golden Leaves among the green. A Mountain Fall.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: Shadow’s head on my pillow

Year Kavannah: Wu Wei

Week Kavannah: Derech Eretz. The way of the land.    “A natural, moral order that exists independent of formal Torah law. This is reflected in the saying, “Derech Eretz preceded the Torah,” and speaks to the innate decency that human beings should possess.”

Tarot: #4, The Lord, reversed. (Druid Craft)

Abuse of authority
This card can signal that someone is abusing their power, whether that’s you or another person. The positive, protective authority of the upright Lord has become a negative, domineering, or overly critical force. This person may be a tyrant rather than a strong leader.
 
 

One brief shining: The reversed Lord read the newspaper this morning, the suppression of free speech by censoring Jimmy Kimmel, the cancellation of Stephen Colbert’s show, the promises to “take down” liberal organizations like the Ford Foundation and the George Soros Open Societies Foundation; he’s signaling the Rubicon of tyranny crossed with deliberate, feral intent. 

Health: Maddie, my palliative care nurse, drove up from Westminster yesterday. I like that at least every other visit with her is in person in my home. Like Dr. Josy, the in home vet. Ha.
 
She’s a sweet person. A Hoosier from da region, that cluster of hard blue collar cities and steel mills tucked up in the extreme northwest corner of the state. When I recounted sister Mary’s line: “Living in Indiana is like living in the Deep South without the benefit of a warmer climate,” she laughed and said, “Oh, that’s so true!”
 

Maddie believes I’ll get good relief from my nerve ablations and the Butrans patch. May it be so.

 

Just a moment: A chill. No, a near absolute zero blast went down my spine when I read about Jimmy Kimmel pulled off the air indefinitely. Talk about unamerican. Roger Cohen and Joseph McCarthy and Father Coughlin have risen from their graves. Ain’t no grave that can keep their vile opinions down.

 

Rise of the Zombie mean guys. Only this time, this second coming of nativist, white supremacist vitriol has the power of a “unitary” President, a self-castrated Congress, and a toadying  Supreme Court. How will we ever climb out of this well of despond?

 

A serious question. First, by not forgetting who we are and who we can still be. Seed-keepers who hold the promise of a welcoming, caring nation. Second, by taking those actions that we can to stand up, right now. To make as clear as possible that this is our country, too. That we will not capitulate, will not bow down in anticipatory obeisance.

After the last immigrant has left the country

Lughnasa and the Cheshbon Nefesh Moon

Wednesday gratefuls: Tom. Rascal. Paul. Findlay. Morning darkness. Cold morning. 36. Hail protection on Artemis. Shadow and her new puzzle. Her morning kisses. Maddie, coming today. Carol yesterday. The Sloan-Kettering trial. The killed comforter. Lashon hara. Words matter. Nerve ablation next month. P.E.T. scan. The never ending thrills.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: Maddie

Year Kavannah: Wu Wei

Week Kavannah: Derech Eretz. The way of the land, the essential human decency that came before Torah.

Tarot: Five of cups, reversed. (Druid Craft)

  • Finding opportunity in setbacks: You are starting to see the value in what you have learned from a painful experience.
  • Open to help: You may now be more willing to accept help from others.

One brief shining: Learning the lesson of accepting help, hard for this head-down, push forward in spite of guy, leaning on the kindness of friends for rides to procedures, appointments does not come without cost and does not come without reward, a cost in changed self-image, the reward understanding it needed to change.

 

Sport: Ohani. A baseball player for the ages. Our Babe Ruth. This Japanese pitcher, yes, that’s right pitcher, just hit 50 home runs in consecutive seasons. He hit number 50 last night against the Philadelphia Phillies. Whadda guy.

Though I’ve never taken to baseball the way my nerdy, statistics oriented son did, I’ll admit in this year, this particular year, a sport in which violence does not feature, in which all team members contribute, one where fans sing songs during the seventh inning stretch, and a sport, like basketball, home grown and oh so American appeals to my need for something of this country that makes me smile.

Just a moment: The Wrath of the already Wrathful. I fear we’ve entered a new, even darker phase of this already far too long presidency. Retribution. Vengeance. Punishment. We may as well have a dominatrix as our leader, one who sees the rest of us as masochists who delight in pain, grin at affliction.

As my friend Paul observed, protesting may carry a new risk. A president and Justice Department and an FBI without a moral compass. No longer constrained by such delicacies as the Bill of Rights, such niceties as habeas corpus. No longer held in check by the courts. Buttressed at times by the National Guard and the U.S. military.

Concentration camps: “Based on internal agency documents, overall detention capacity is projected to increase significantly. One document from July 2025 reported plans to add 10,312 beds through no-bid contracts alone. This was part of an effort to increase overall capacity to at least 100,000 beds” Gemini on beds for immigrant detainees to be added by building new facilities, opening shuttered prisons, and adding capacity like the tents for up 5,000 at Ft. Bliss (get the irony here?)

Here’s my question. Once the last immigrant has been detained and the last flight for South Sudan or Venezuela or Ghana has left the ground who will fill up those freshly empty beds?

Given the state of play after Charlie Kirk’s assassination? Any who deviate. From the good, the true, and the proper. As defined by angry, bitter people who see mercy and justice as weakness. Lordy, lordy.

A Culture Dying of Lead Poisoning

Lughnasa and the Cheshbon Nefesh Moon

Thursday gratefuls: Teshuva. Accounting of the soul. Shadow on my pillow. Sleeping. 9/11. My son’s decision on account of it. Seoah. Murdoch. Jangs. Singapore. Time with Mary there and in Hawai’i. The anguish of our Middle East actions. Of Israel’s. The Evergreen Shooting. Columbine. Guns. Gun control. Our poor benighted nation. Charlie Kirk.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: Tara’s hot tub garden bed

Year Kavannah: Wu Wei

Week Kavannah: Ometz Lev. Strength of the heart. A middah I wish for all parents and school children in Evergreen this day.

Tarot: Ten of Cups, (Druid Craft)

  • Domestic Harmony: Suggests a stable, secure, and happy home environment. This card often points to a desire for or achievement of an idyllic country life.
  • Gratitude and Blessings: A call to recognize and appreciate the blessings you have. The cups are a reminder of the rewards that come from love and connection. 

One brief shining: This Shadow Mountain home with its three levels, the guest level and the home office, the main level with Arts and Crafts furniture and lights, the fireplace, the breakfast nook built by Jon, a remodeled kitchen, a pantry, an exercise room, the downstairs level with its oriental rugs, comfy chairs, television, bedroom, and laundry room, Shadow’s food and toys, the fenced in backyard filled with Lodgepoles, Grasses, Groundcovers, Wild Flowers, and now Artemis, a place of memories with Kate, with Vega, Rigel, Gertie, Kepler, with guests over the years, its solar panels, its four car garage and library above, a front with no lawn, more Lodgepoles and Aspens, Kate’s Iris bed and her Lilacs in back has been my refuge, my hermitage, my home of eleven years come this Winter Solstice. Yes to the Ten of Cups.

Oh, my: Gabe and Ruth both sent texts. Gabe: “So today Charlie (Kirk) got shot and killed. And evergreen highschool got shot up. Today is strange.”  Ruth: “One of the things I don’t get is how you can be so set on defending a fetus and its life yet guns are more of a right than life is for students.”

Rabbi Jamie opened our sanctuary to any in town who might need it. Ironically he presented a program last night on teshuva. “While often translated as repentance, its deeper meaning is about taking action to return to one’s true, divine self…” Gemini The Jewish month of Elul, in which we are right now, encourages a time of reflection-of cheshbon nefesh, an accounting of the soul-with the aim of teshuva before Rosh Hashanah.

How can we as a nation, as a culture, return to, as one sage put it, the landscape of our soul? Not just the shooter(s) in the 47 school shootings to date this year (Ruth’s numbers), no, but our  culture dying from lead poisoning.

Where is the landscape in which I grew up? Flawed in many, many ways to be sure, but at least one in which gun owners hunted, did not demand their “second amendment rights” and the only duck and cover was to shield ourselves (ha) from a nuclear explosion.

Interesting Times

Summer and the Korea Moon

Shabbat gratefuls: Shabbat. The coming of the Jang’s. Aug. 2. My son and Seoah. Gabe and Joanne. Artemis. An early sprouter. 1 Red Russian Kale. More and more Tomato Blooms. Hard Rock. Ledges. Boulders. Scree. Talus. Mountains. Oceans. Beaches. Tides. Riprap. Water. Lakes. Great Lakes. Lake Superior. Lake Huron. Michigan. Erie. Ontario.

Sparks of Joy and Awe: Rocks and Water

Year Kavannah: Wu Wei

Week Kavannah: Yirah. Awe.

“Our goal should be to live life in radical amazement. ….get up in the morning and look at the world in a way that takes nothing for granted. Everything is phenomenal; everything is incredible; never treat life casually. To be spiritual is to be amazed.”
― Abraham Joshua Heschel

Tarot: The Woodward. How can I increase my joy of the sabbath?

One brief shining: We sat, the four of us at a round table, not our usual one which had occupiers, Gabe meeting Joanne with his desire to become a writer, excited and yet quietly confident, Alan guiding the conversation’s focus on Gabe and Joanne while punning, always.

 

Family: Part of the role of family. Recognizing the dream of the moment for another. Helping them get as far as they can. Visiting my son. From base to base. Ruth changing majors from art to pre-med. Yes. Gabe meeting Joanne at the Dandelion yesterday. Encouraging Mark as he advances in Saudi.

We do not choose another’s path. But we can spread roses along it.

 

Dog journal: Shadow has become a regular inside at night dog! I’m pretty sure we’re over that puzzling moment in our history. Thank god.

Her job during the day lies in patrolling the backyard for what are, to Shadow’s mind, errant creatures. Barking at them. This is my place. Not yours. Go somewhere else.

This job entails a lot of lying on the ground and resting, yet remaining alert. Unless Great Sol warms her belly and she falls asleep.

 

Judaism: I love Heschel’s idea of living life in radical amazement. My everyday, every moment hope for myself. That I can see the sacred lying there asleep in Great Sol’s warmth. That even the pain in my buttocks says, yes, you’re alive! That the Water I drink comes from Mother Earth’s recycled, refreshed, purified supply. That my fingers still remember the keys. That my body breathes. My heart beats.

Yirah, indeed. Joy of the sabbath. Yes.

 

Just a moment: Saw an article about RTTL, Return to the Land, an Arkansas version of South Africa’s Orania, a white-separatist town. RTTL has 160 acres in Arkansas and want to start a new version of their back to the land, whites only community in Missouri.

Idaho already has several back to the land far-right commune-like spots. Granola conservatives. Funny. We had a different idea for the same back to the land idea in the sixties.

RTTL: “You want a white nation? Build a white town,” Eric Orwoll says, in one video posted on social media. “It can be done. We’re doing it.”

“RTTL is at the vanguard of an ethnonationalist movement that has been organising online – a network that aims to define countries by ethnicity but which links across borders.” Sky news, op cit

We’re living in interesting times.