My presentation for the last class of three semesters of Astrology and Kabbalah.
Embrace the fuzziness. Nicole. Good advice, Nicole. Life is full of fuzziness. Anyone who claims clarity needs to polish the lens of their inner eye. Anyone who claims certainty needs to pause and open the scope of their knowledge. Even science, perhaps especially science, is true for this moment only. Until new data becomes available.
Knowing these things lead me for many years to be a flat-earth skeptic. Even if you think you can prove it to me, you can’t. I wasn’t, at least most of the time, belligerent about it. I would quietly say no and step to the side of onrushing dogma or ideology. Only put up a raised hand, palm out, if I considered them racist, or unjust, or sexist, or dangerous in some way to self or others. Turns out there are a lot of those, but you all know that.
With Astrology I’m choosing to step to the side. I can see the benefits it brings to those of you who pursue it. A means of self-reflection, self-critique. Amen to that. With the caveat that Judaism insists on: no predictive Astrology, its value as a tool is first and foremost for personal, even soul learning.
As Elisa said, “It may not be your language.” As a tool for my personal use, not right now anyhow. I still want to get readings of my chart. Go figure. But as for pursuing this more on my own. Not right now.
As with all the classes at Kabbalah Experience, I’ve enjoyed my fellow students and teachers. I’ve learned a lot. Certainly about Astrology, but also about how Kabbalah interacts with the months and how the Tree of Life can add meaning to the pursuits of Astrology.
A pleasure to learn with you all. Thanks for all the fish.
Tuesday gratefuls: Acting lessons. Kep. No puppy. Proctitis. Radiation. The gift that keeps on giving. Prostate Cancer. Medical care. Dr. Gonzales. Kristie. A little low. Possibility of a recession. Blue Sky. Rain yesterday. Last day of Astrology class today. Disorientation. Sadness. A bit. Will to live. Orfeo by Richard Powers.
Sparks of Joy and Awe: Evergreen Animal Protection League
Tarot: Queen of Stones, the Bear
“You are an inspiration, a mentor, and a positive role model for those around you. Share what you have and know that the Universe will send more.
…you are magnetic and will attract the right people and opportunity will come to you…set your intention to be for the Highest Good. Others will be drawn to your inner authenticity, abilities, and strength. There is sensuality at play here too. You are most attractive when you are just being you. Know this and show it…fully. Unleash the need to be anything else but exactly who you are.” tarotx.net
Well. Well. Well. Three times in a row. After three shuffles of the deck each time and three cuts. Guess the Wildwood deck has a message for me. Be a mother Bear. Be a mother Bear. Be a mother Bear. OK. OK. I’ll be a mother Bear. Third time is a Bear, too. If she shows up tomorrow, I’m going to invest in a set of claws.
Not really sure what to make of this. In the year since I learned about the Tarot I may have had the same card come up twice though I’d have to check. I know I’ve never had one come up three times in a row.
Feeling a little low today. Might be anemia. Proctitis, an unpleasant sequelae of 35 sessions of futile radiation, has flared. Blood loss. Taking steps. Not a serious issue, but not one to take lightly either. Feels like my medical stuff has become more and more complicated. Getting treatments for the secondary effects of my treatments. Geez.
Trusting my doctors, Kate. You were right. It relieves anxiety to put my trust in those trained to care for me. And, I will, assuming I feel they do care for me. Both as a person and a patient. Kristie and Kristen? For sure. As usual just laying this down on the page here, saying it out loud, calms me.
Started my new doubled dose of thyroid hormone replacement. Today. That should give me a boost of energy when it kicks in. Something I could use.
Felt off at acting lessons last night. Hard to focus. Seemed everyone had a nadir, too. Jill and Alan weren’t there. The Rock of Ages rehearsal in the other Evergreen Players space kept coming through the wall. Cold rain. Sort of a blah.
I give a ride to Deb to acting class. She and Robbie have a dog, Gracie. I mentioned her before. Gracie is thirteen and a very sweet dog. I always talk to her when I pick up Deb.
Robbie’s out of town and Gracie is in Bergen Bark Inn. A Cow Elk and her newborn took up residence in Robbie’s yard. The Cow charges cars and people. And, Gracie. It scared Gracie so much that she refuses to go outside while the Cow is there. Hence, Bergen Bark Inn. I saw the Elk last night when I picked up Deb. She did not charge my car.
Living in the Mountains requires adjustments. Our wild neighbors live here, too. Most of us try to interfere with them as little as possible. Aside from the roads, houses, lights, and noise we’ve already brought into their home.
So the Cow Elk stays and the dog goes to the kennel for a while. Reasonable choice up here.
In other doggy news. My application for Kahlua was denied. They did not agree with my answer about how to treat growling/biting behavior. No, no bad dog. Step on front feet. First lightly, then harder if necessary. They said, rightly I think, that they never support hurting an animal. I was too hasty in filling out the form, didn’t give a thought to how that answer might be read. In fact that was the cure to a Wolfhound jumping up on you. Never had to do it more than twice. Still. I take their point.
Maybe I’m meant to wait. Kep’s leg stopped bothering him. Grateful for that. Also, he’s back in the bed at night, even for naps. He may be moving through his grieving. I get it.
This mother Bear is hungry. My stomach is growling. Gonna get breakfast.
