Category Archives: Family
Up Again
Samhain Waning Thanksgiving Moon
Here I am, at it again. Don’t know why this damned tooth/jaw deal has interfered with my sleep this last two nights and not before, but there you are.
Got pretty serious there on the post below, so I’ll try to stay a bit lighter here in the dark.
Finished my Latin, english to Latin, yesterday, early, partly because I got up at 4 am or 5 or whatever. Went back to bed at 9, got up at 11:30. The whole day seemed off, sort of out of kilter. Now I’m up again, an insomniac spurred on by the loss of wisdom. Which, come to think of it, out to do it.
As Kate comes closer and closer to retirement, January 7th is her date, I can sense a change, a sort of gathering in, nesting beginning. I just ordered a few books on movies, for example, thinking we might use our Netflix account to watch movies together one night a week, a date but at home. We’ve also gotten Kate’s quilt operation set up in a sewing room, upstairs, her long arm quilter, downstairs where her sewing room used to be and her piecing table cum storage in the spot we once had a pool table.
We’ve spent a good bit of time, as I’m sure most do, on our retirement finances, a project not yet finished, with my pension numbers yet to come and Kate’s medicare part D, but we’ll finish before the end of December.
Given the adequate, but tight fit of our budget in the coming years, we’ll probably travel less, a thought that at one time would have jarred me, but that now I find manageable. Short trips to visit family, perhaps longer ones up north or down to Chicago, not quite so far away, so much money. We’ll save up for a trip or two to somewhere interesting: Churchill, Ontario, the Southwest, but cruises and foreign travel will be difficult.
In the growing season, of course, we have the bees, the orchard, the vegetable gardens and the flower gardens that we care for together. We’ll get into the city to the museums, theatre and music more than we have.
Mostly, though, we’ll enjoy each others company and live not a good deal differently from what we do right now.
Black Friday
Samhain Waning Thanksgiving Moon
Kate had to tell me, again, what black Friday means. Apparently (and you probably already know this) it’s the date retailers calculate they slip over from being in the red to being in the black. When I have trouble remembering something, it’s often because I have another association clogging up the rememberer. In this case black Friday has a theological tinge in my brain; it takes me to a day of lost hope, ultimate despair. As a result, I have trouble associating it with anything positive.
If I consider the number of people camped outside (one woman since Wednesday night at a particular BestBuy), and, if I consider the reason many of them are in those lines, my association seems closer to the mark. Our emphasis on extravagant gifts to celebrate the birthday of a man who wanted us to declare freedom to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind has always revealed the dark side hedonism which we let loose at Christmas, but the pitiful sight of people braving cold and inclement weather as blind captives of our economic system. Well…
A very positive note is the number of scientists now willing to engage in reasoned debate on the topic of global warming. Understanding the science behind global warming takes careful attention to several different lines of reasoning and a dispassionate explication of those various strands works best from within a scientific rather than a political frame. Perhaps, as an article in the paper said, we will be able to move beyond this debate and onto the question of what can we do.
We are not saving the earth; the earth will be fine no matter what we do. We want to preserve an earth fit for human habitation; that’s what’s at risk here. Can we learn to live on this planet lightly enough that it can carry us, feeding us, watering us, disposing of our wastes, providing materiale necessary for our habitations and our economies? Those are the stakes.
Axel’s
Samhain Waning Thanksgiving Moon
Kate, Annie and I ate Thanksgiving dinner at Axel’s Woodroast in Roseville. This was a major production, a huge buffet and seating for family size parties in the ballroom. The food was good, not gourmet, but good. I actually had breakfast, more or less, a crepe, bacon, scrambled eggs, some asparagus, watermelon and a mixed green salad followed by two creme brulee tarts. Our waitress was an old hand who stayed mostly out of the picture, showing up just when we needed things for the most part.
I found the large number of people satisfying, as it mimicked the crowded Thanksgivings of my childhood. I had the large number of people feeling without having to actually interact them. Perfect.
Kate’s in for a nap, the dogs have toys to play with and I’m going back to reading my Chinese mystery novel.
Hope your afternoon is a good one, too.
Not Stepping In The Same River Twice
Samhain Waning Thanksgiving Moon
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. You, too, tiny Tim.
Stayed up late last night reading a novel about a Chinese detective in Chinatown, NYC. Not sure how it happened but China has become my favorite country, much like Germany used to be and Russia before that. Instead of Buddenbrooks I read Romance of the Three Kingdoms, instead of Steppenwolf I read Chinese mysteries. No more War and Peace, Crime and Punishment, though I could read them again, I choose, as I always have, to plow new ground, read things I have not read before.
I tend not to read things twice, except poetry. A big part of reading for me is the journey to somewhere new, following a trail with no known ending, a similar joy to the one I find in traveling, especially to countries where the culture disorients me, leaves me little room for my old ways.
New disciplines give me a similar boost: art history, Latin, writing, vegetable gardening, bee keeping, hydroponics. I’m sure I miss something in my search for the novel, which may explain why I find living in the same house for 16 years, driving the same car for 16 years, being married to Kate for 20+ years soothing. As Taoism teaches, life is a dynamic movement between opposites, the new and the old, the familiar and the strange, the taxing and the comfortable. The juice flows as the pulls of masculine and feminine, life and death, youth and age keep us fresh, vital.
My buddy Mario uproots himself and moves along the earth’s surface, finding new homes and new encounters. He changes his work with apparent ease, finding new friends and new experiences as he does. Brother Jim, Dusty, constantly challenges his present and his past, leaving himself always slightly off balance. Both of these men take the juice and mold it into art.
There are many ancientrails through this life, including intentional disorientation, familiar surroundings, ambition, compassion, politics, nurturance, keen observation, delight, dance. The key lies in finding yours and staying with it, getting to know it and to be it.
When you can, you will find every day (well, most days) are Thanksgiving.
Thanksgiving Eve
Samhain Waning Thanksgiving Moon
Grocery shopping this morning, the day before Thanksgiving. Like traveling by air on a holiday. Like going to see the Tower of London in July. Like shopping on Black Friday. I went early though and it wasn’t too bad. There was the man with one turkey in his cart, a shocked disorientation on his face, his white hair wild. A woman with black flats, a wool skirt below the ankle and a helmet like cloth hat strapped under her chin. A woman and her mother, mom in a white faux fur coat, shiny cloth pants and dangly ear-rings with zircon or diamond but I’d bet zircon. The clerk from Nevis. I had a farm near Nevis. Oh, where? On Spider Lake. Oh, a friend of mine has a resort on Spider Lake. Did you find everything you were looking for?
The message board had advertisements for guys offering snow plowing services. I memorized a number, 227-9899, and called for a free estimate when I got home.
Sleepy now, Latin this afternoon and evening, Thanksgiving tomorrow. A restaurant meal for us this year, Axel’s Wood Roast in St. Paul. Annie’s coming up.
Out, Out Damned Football
Samhain Full Thanksgiving Moon
Like quitting smoking, which I did cold turkey, I have quit watching football. I don’t need the aggravation, especially with the Vikes and I don’t see the gain, if any, as worth it anymore. Leaves me with Sunday to clear up piles, do Latin, that sort of thing. On the other hand the Gopher basketball team looks pretty good.
Kate’s home from her retreat with more stash and a few more projects. She’s started on a Japanese quilt design that looks pretty interesting.
Yak Trax
Samhain Waxing Thanksgiving Moon
We have a sloping, long drive way. Most days no big deal. On days like today, when rain has fallen, then frozen, it requires special equipment: yak trax. They slip on over the shoe or boot and the rope like wire keeps you upright. I bought a pair of these after going out for the paper one morning, not real long after my achilles repair. My feet went up and I fell just like one of those cartoon characters, head smacking the driveway with no restraint. Blood pulsing down my head I went inside, woke Kate up and said, “I think I need some help here.” These days I slip on the yaktrax and walk with a grip to the mailbox.
Kate called this morning from her quilt retreat bus, on her way to Eau Claire. A truck pulling two trailers had upended near the spot of her call. That part of Wisconsin can be treacherous in this kind of weather. She said the bus driver had it handled. I hope so.
I’m going through an episodic pile reduction, pitching or filing paper of one kind or another that seemed important at one point in the past. I always the feel when I finish. Clarity.
Sheepshead
Samhain Waxing Thanksgiving Moon
The card gods were pretty good to me. I had some good hands, some good luck and a lot of fun tonight at sheepshead. We had a great evening with a lot of laughter. It’s nice to be with guys who can see the humor in their own lives.
The wisdom teeth began to throb tonight, a bit surprising after a calm period since the extraction. I’ve felt fatigued and a bit spacy, but no real pain until today.
I will be happy when Kate’s work is done in early January and she goes on casual time. Having her here will make our home feel more vital.
Over the weekend I plan to put the bees to rest for the winter and make some more soup with the last of the leeks. Latin tomorrow.
Getting Closer
Samhain Waxing Thanksgiving Moon
Kate spent 3+ hours at a sewing workshop, creating place mats. They’re beautiful. She’s done a lot recently to kick her sewing up another notch, learning how to use the embroidery module on her Bernina, assembling her machine quilter, making more difficult quilts, turning out purses of her own design, going to classes, joining a quilting guild and signing up for road trips to various quilt shops. She sews a lot, disappearing into her sewing room and working for hours at a stretch, often oblivious to time. She gets in flow.
She’s a bare month and half + a few days from retirement and she’s ready. Her casual time will be only 4 work units or so a month with plenty of flexibility.
Our day-to-day lives will probably change little, except Kate won’t be leaving for work at any point during the day. Once she’s retired, I plan to drive the truck in the winter and let the red car ride out the icy season in the garage. It’s not the best on snow and ice. That sort of thing, otherwise we’ll cook, tend the garden, do our creative work, travel some, volunteer here and there.
Living, not retiring.