Imbolc Valentine Moon

Snow storm headed our way. March and April are big snow months in the Rockies. Looking forward to watching the snow fall and temperatures drop. Black Mountain will be white again for a while. Shadow Mountain, too. Flakes already spitting as I went out to get the paper.
We’ve settled into a routine of sorts. Sometime during the day I swap out Kate’s tpn bag. She assists by drawing up the vitamins. I make small meals or heat up left overs. We both eat when we’re hungry rather than at meal times except for breakfast. Being hooked up to the oxygen concentrator all day, her nutrition bag, too, makes Kate restricted in her movements. A major reason I bowed out at CBE. Responding to anything out of the ordinary is difficult for her right now. Lot of reading. Some television. Talking.
Placing the feeding tube awaits the pulmonologist’s assessment of Kate’s lungs. If she gives us a go, then the feeding tube could go in as soon as a week. That will change the routine. The J-tube, as it’s called because it goes into the jejunum, will not have the sterile procedures of the tpn and is gravity fed, so no pump. How things will look then we’ll have to see.
Our Kenmore frostless freezer forgot its prime directive. I had to take everything out yesterday. Fortunately, I had all those styrofoam coolers the folks at Option Care have been sending with vitamins and nutrition bags. Checked it on the way up here this morning, the freezer’s in the garage. Almost all the ice build up is gone. Gonna get out the lysol and wipe the whole thing down, restore what wasn’t freezer burned and turn it back on. Having a freezer in Minnesota in the winter always made me think of salesmen and Eskimos.
Though I’m tired by the afternoon, my energy level has begun to return to normal. We’ve still got a puzzle to solve, revealed by my illness. What do we do if I get sick again? Hard to imagine I’m gonna get something this dramatic again anytime soon, but it didn’t occur to us that I’d get sick at all. We’re noodling this one.
We also agreed yesterday that I can go out as long as I’m not more than a half hour away, have my phone with me, charged and on. That means I’ll be able to go to CBE events occasionally. This is a time of intensive healing for Kate, getting her nourishment levels back to normal, then working on weight gain. Don’t wanna screw that up in any way.
As to moving. We’re going to consult the pulmonologist who is the ultimate authority here on these matters. That’s this Thursday. Once we get her input we’ll be able to make more intelligent decisions.
We have impressive ice dams on our north facing roofs. Before the idea of a move came up I was going to have them removed and electric heat tape installed to prevent them in the future. Now each thing that involves putting more money in the house will require scrutiny. Still going to have the ice dams removed though. Not cheap.

Meanwhile the dogs are healthy. Rigel’s eating well. Her predatory instincts have remained strong. When I cleared the deck last week, a rabbit squirted out from under it and ran to the shed. No wonder she spends a lot time sniffing at the deck, clawing rocks out of the way (when things aren’t frozen). Kep’s blown his coat with the recent run of over 50 degree weather. Off to Petsmart this week for defurmination.
Then there’s Gertie. This bitch bit me in the thigh last week. Three holes in my leg, blood dripping down, and a monster bruise. She wanted to get to the gutter guy who was trying to give me an estimate on the heating tape. She has an anger problem when it comes to any visitors. She’ll bite without warning. That was the issue that caused Jon and Jen to decide to euthanize her. We took her to spare her life. Most of the time she’s a really sweet girl, all doggy leans and kisses, especially to me. She spends most of her time with me. But…
The waxing moon has not brought the weight gain I’d hoped. Maybe next month. We talked yesterday about eating disorders and their relevance to Kate’s situation. Through a combination of aversive conditioning, nausea and cramping triggered by eating, the dry mouth issues of Sjogren’s that can make food unpalatable, a generally depleted musculature that makes it difficult to work up an appetite, and a feeling of malaise we’ve not been able to shake, eating has become problematic. Sounds like an eating disorder. If it quacks…
Much as I like the dark, the cold, the snow, I also love the growing season. Imbolc, Feb. 1st, (or, as for all Celtic holidays, a full week of markets and dances), marks the turn from winter, the season just past, toward spring, or Ostara, which we celebrate on the spring equinox. That’s what Groundhog Day celebrates, Imbolc, and a European belief that if a furry rodent saw it’s shadow, there would be six more weeks of winter. In Germany it’s the badger that is the predictor. The Pennsylvania Dutch apparently shifted to the groundhog.

Any of these things separately, happy, joyful tasks. All of them on the same day, a day that started with fatigue on waking? The happiness and joy would have to be in retrospect. I make chicken soup from scratch, with a whole chicken, cut up celery, onions, carrots, and garlic sauteed first. Wine to deglaze. Add water, lot of water. The chicken in its wire mesh cage. Wait for it to boil. Up here, longer than normal. An hour or so of simmering, then a package of frozen peas and one of frozen corn. Another ten minute. Retrieve the chicken, set it out to cool. Later, pick the meat from the bones. Put it in the soup. A lot of standing.
I’m not describing this well. I was a runner in a marathon. My resources had tapped out around 5 pm. As I got onto 6th street going east past Santa Fe, I hit the wall. Still had to cross Denver, get into Aurora, see Jon, then Maria’s. By the time I pulled out of the Stanley Marketplace parking lot, empanadas steaming in their cardboard box, I had half the marathon to finish. But I was already finished. My bed, however, was over an hour away, 45 miles, the first 20 miles back across the Denver metro. No choice.


Snowing here. About an inch already. Then comes the cold. But not like the cold my friends in Minnesota are going to feel. For example, Tue -7 for a high, -27 for a low. Wed -15 for a high, -30 for a low. Also, winds in the 10 to 19 mph range. Wind chill will be brutal. Enduring the last of any January will qualify you for Minnesota macho. Plan a trip there now to claim it for yourself.
The bulgogi was good. So was the dumpling soup. The porkbelly last night? Not so much. Got a little rushed since I fried the smelt at the same time. Shouldn’t have done both. The smelt, which I realize now were considerably smaller than the Lake Superior smelt, fried up fine, but I bunched them together too much. And, fried things don’t work so well as left overs. In the trash after my meal. SeoAh sent me her sauce for the porkbelly, which I used. It couldn’t rescue a too fatty, not enough taste dish. Not sure I’ll try that one again. Didn’t seem worth learning how to do well. Tonight straight up American fare. Macaroni and cheese? Hamburgers? Steak and potatoes? Something more in my wheelhouse.
More snow on the way. Not too much.


I finished the creation of the waters yesterday. Some gold flake to give continuity with the first one, not finished yet because I’m waiting on some Elmer’s glue for the gold leaf.
Shhh. Don’t tell anybody or you might jinx it, but I think Kate’s starting to gain weight. She’s at 84, past the 82 pound barrier that seemed so intractable. yay. shhh.
Went out to DIA late last night and picked up SeoAh’s husband. Got back here about 11:00 pm, well past my sell by date in terms of sleep. The dogs didn’t get fed until 7:30 am. Gabe’s here, too. Jon brought him up last night. Jon and Ruth will go skiing today at A-Basin, then pick Gabe up on their way home. It’s been a very family oriented Christmas and New Years and January. Friends, too.
Quick geopolitical quiz. Where is Tajikistan? No googling, no globe, no world map. Where is it? If you know, you get the sister city of Boulder appellation, Friend of Dushanbe. Friend of what? Oh, you didn’t know that Dushanbe is the capital of Tajikistan? No, we’re not revoking your nametag. Not only are we not revoking your nametag, we’re inviting you over to tea at a traditional Tajikistan Tea House donated to Boulder by the citizens of Dushanbe. And, it’s a stunner.
Though we didn’t sit on one of them, there were also raised platforms with cushions and short tables. Looked like fun to me.


